House of Whores

MOVIE REVIEW: House of Whores (2015)

By Amy Lynes

HOW

Director: Paul Arnone, Tom Komisar and Daniel Murphy

Starring: Linda Schrader, Linsey McIntire,
R.J. Cecott, Maella Cai Vane, and Nurse Hatchet

Wow...Where do I even begin with this one? House of Whores was unlike anything I have seen thus far, and I have seen my fair share of shocking and unexplainable shit. It isn't often that I am stunned into silence, but this movie managed to accomplish just that. For close to a half an hour after the credits rolled, I was still sitting there, trying to figure out just what in the actual fuck I had just witnessed.

The movie starts off with sexy “Nurse Hatchet” warning that the movie could be considered graphic and disturbing by some viewers, which she underscores by dancing seductively and smearing blood all over herself.

Then it starts of with some sleazy asshole auditioning young women for his film project, Double Fisting. He has assembled three young actresses and, based on the cheesiness of his questions alone, it's obvious that he's a real dirtbag and is most likely just looking to get laid and maybe see some weird and kinky shit along the way.

The poor, unsuspecting girls are trying to get cast in this guy’s shitty spank film when three completely fucked up, psycho ass clowns (Smasho, Slasho, and Shago) suddenly bust in on them and a whole new kind of movie begins to go down.

As the title suggests, House of Whores is a sick, sleazy, and sexually violent Indie horror film, complete with new ways to rape and torture. Thanks to this film I will never look at a cheese grater, toilet brush, or a drill quite the same way again. Pain, suffering and unrelenting brutality are swiftly doled out to the unlucky ladies who had the misfortune of showing up for this casting call from hell and it is not pretty. And by the time these clowns are done with them, neither are they.

Even though its run time is only somewhere around an hour, we have a sort of intermission period every so often, a break from the carnage that allows Nurse Hatchet center stage with her sexy, blood covered dance. As much as I love her and have been a longtime fan, it seems to distract from the film and like maybe it would have been better suited as part of the bonus features as it really has nothing much to do with the storyline. I didn't really understand it, although it is nice to see her getting more exposure.

Those with an aversion to a plethora of body fluids or a weak stomach, will want to avoid this movie. I kind of wish I had. It was nauseating and, as I mentioned earlier, I have seen more than my fair share of extreme movies and nothing much bothers me. But this film? House of Whores depicts a laundry list of vomit-inducing acts, from forced rape to Dirty Sanchezes and shit eating. At one point it actually made me gag. This movie is for those who are into really sleazy and downright gross exploitation or snuff films and who aren't easily disgusted. I know there is an audience out there for this type of film. A large one, in fact. I am just not one of said audience members. Still, I give the filmmakers a lot of respect for taking on a film like this. Not all filmmakers are this brave with films such as this.

This movie spits, defecates, and bleeds all over its viewers and makes no apologies for it. Zero. But I suppose that’s part of the allure and most likely what the filmmakers set out to do with it. If that's the case, it has done its job rather effectively and this little Indie film is a raging success.

My stomach just couldn't take it. When it was over, I was nauseated, I felt like I needed to be disinfected, and I kind of hated myself for sitting through the whole thing.

And viewers beware! House of Whores 2: The Second Cumming will be on it's way soon...

Rating 5/10

Posted by Alan Smithee

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