The Late Dr. Lady Show

VORTEXX SCHEDULE FOR FEBRUARY 12 – 19, 2017

VORTEXX SCHEDULE FOR FEBRUARY 12 – 19, 2017

Welcome to The Vortexx where it's been ALL HOSTS ALL THE TIME FOR SIX YEARS!

THE VORTEXX! SIX YEARS STRONG!!!!!

Welcome to THE VORTEXX where it's ALL HOSTS ALL THE TIME! We've got a terrific line-up of hosts, shows, and movies this week, including one great new host making his Vortexx debut, one great movie making its debut, and a SLUGGO BIRTHDAY BASH to begin the week. Be sure to stick around Saturday night after our featured movie for VORTEXX FLASHBACK RADIO -- a tribute to the old-time radio shows of yesteryear. Our hosts this week are Sluggo & Sluggles, Deadwood & Co., Slash (making his debut on Monday), Arachna & Deadly, Edgar von Ghoul, Cnl. Graves & Smiley Bones, Karlos Borloff & the crazies at Monster Madhouse, Dr. Lady & the Usual Suspects, and Misty Brew. Enjoy our shows and thanks for hanging out!

SLUGGO'S STRANGE TAILS presents WILD GUITAR (1962) for SLUGGO BIRTHDAY BASH!

Sunday (2/12). 9:00 P.M. (ET) Join us tonight for our SLUGGO BIRTHDAY BASH! On February 12 each year our nation celebrates the birthday of two great presidents -- Abraham Lincoln, president of the United States, and Sluggo Gonzales, freely elected president of the Vortexx. It should come as no surprise that the movie our Dear Leader has decided to host on her birthday stars her favorite actor, singer, and musician -- Arch Hall, Jr. Be sure to come by tonight as SLUGGO'S STRANGE TAILS with co-host Sluggles and special guest Wolfie presents Sluggo's all-time favorite Arch Hall, Jr. movie -- and, believe us, folks, she loves them all! -- WILD GUITAR (1962). In tonight's movie, released just eight months after Eegah, Arch plays Bud Eagle, a young musician who comes under the influence of unscrupulous record producer Mike McCauley (Arch Hall, Sr.). Co-star Cash Flagg (who also directed under his birth name Ray Dennis Steckler) hams it up as McCauley's henchman Steak in what has to be the "meatiest" role of his career. Our show will be followed by an encore presentation of SCREAMING SOUP: HELLBOUND.

SLASH'S GRAVEYARD TALES presents Ed Wood's PLAN 9 FROM OUTER SPACE (1959)

Monday (2/13). 9:00 P.M. (ET) Join us tonight as we welcome Indiana's newest horror host to The Vortexx with SLASH'S GRAVEYARD TALES. An artist, sculptor, pro wrestler, and haunter at the Harrodsburg Haunted House in his previous life, Slash is a Wolf Man who loves the old-time classic horror and sci-fi movies. And now that he's been bitten by the horror host bug, he's put together a show that he describes as "a cross between Pee-wee's Playhouse and Tales from the Crypt." Tonight Slash and his sidekicks Poe, Hoots, and Bones will be hosting Ed Wood's PLAN 9 FROM OUTER SPACE (1959). This is a movie that needs no introduction, but we're going to give you one anyway. A couple of pompous aliens in silk pajamas (Dudley Manlove and Joanna Lee) and their leader The Ruler (Bunny Breckinridge) plan to resurrect Bela Lugosi, Vampira, and Tor Johnson as slow-moving zombies. Why? Because all you of Earth are Idiots!

BEWARE THEATER presents THE BRAIN THAT WOULDN'T DIE (1962)

Tuesday (2/14). 9:00 P.M. (ET) Happy Valentine's Day to all our friends in The Vortexx! Tonight we've picked a movie that we feel is suitable for the occasion. It's a lovely love story about a mad scientist who loves his girlfriend so much that he's willing to stalk and murder to get a new body for her." Join us tonight as BEWARE THEATER with Arachna of the Spider People and her friend Deadly presents THE BRAIN THAT WOULDN'T DIE (1962). Affectionately known to its many fans as "The Brain That Wouldn't Shuddup" and "Jan in the Pan," this film has everything that a B-movie fan could possibly ask for -- mutants, mad doctors, talking heads, cat fighting strippers, and some of the sleaziest, most infectious music you've ever heard.

MIDNIGHT CHILLERS presents THE EMBALMER (1965)

Wednesday (2/15). 9:00 P.M. (ET) MIDNIGHT CHILLERS with Edgar von Ghoul presents THE EMBALMER (1965) aka The Monster of Venice. A psycho in a monk's robe and skull mask dons a scuba suit and stalks the canals of Venice looking for victims (all beautiful women, of course) to kill and then bring to his secret underwater lair for the titular embalming. Unfortunately, the budget did not allow for any underwater photography, which might have improved the killing scenes. But the secret lair, revealed at the end of the movie, is something to be seen.

SCREAMING SOUP reviews Fred Olen Ray's EVIL TOONS (1992)

Wednesday (2/15). 11:15 P.M. (ET) Don't go away folks! Stick around after Midnight Chillers for another episode of SCREAMING SOUP! Now entering its fourth season, this animated horror host show specializes in raunchy movie reviews. In tonight's episode our host Deadwest reviews Fred Olen Ray's EVIL TOONS (1992) while being ambushed by Buzzkill, a competing horror host. A knock-off of Sam Raimi's The Evil Dead, tonight's movie stars David Carradine, Dick Miller, Arte Johnson, and scream queen Michelle Bauer. Please note: This episode contains nudity and gross-out raunchiness and is, therefore, recommended for immature adults only.

PUBLIC DOMAIN DRIVE-IN presents Roger Corman's QUEEN OF BLOOD (1966)

Thursday (2/16). 9:00 P.M. (ET) PUBLIC DOMAIN DRIVE-IN with Cnl. Graves and Smiley Bones presents Roger Corman’s QUEEN OF BLOOD (1966). Here we go again! Corman got his hands on some more Russian footage, hired someone to write a screenplay around it, brought in Basil Rathbone and a few other English-speaking actors, and finished the whole thing in little over a week at a cost of $65,000. But the really strange thing is . . . this is actually a very good movie! Florence Marley gives a deliciously creepy performance as a green-skinned, glowing-eyed alien woman who is rescued on Mars to be brought back to Earth and proceeds to drain the blood from assorted crew members on the way home. Keep an eye out for a delightful cameo appearance by Forrest J Ackerman at the end.

MONSTER MADHOUSE presents HORROR EXPRESS (1972)

Friday (2/17). 9:00 P.M. (ET) MONSTER MADHOUSE with Karlos Borloff, Slo Frank, and a cast of thousands presents HORROR EXPRESS (1972) starring Peter Cushing, Christopher Lee, and Telly (Kojak) Savalas. Our three stars find themselves traveling on the Trans-Siberian Express, accompanied by the frozen remains of a primitive humanoid creature who, needless to say, doesn't stay frozen for long. As always, there will be plenty of insane hijinks by Borloff and the Madhouse crazies both during and in between segments of the movie. Truth be told, we lost count of the number of times Frank gets punched, poked, and slapped silly in tonight’s episode!

THE LATE DR LADY SHOW presents Jess Franco’s OASIS OF THE ZOMBIES (1981)

Saturday (2/18). 9:00 P.M. (ET) THE LATE DR LADY SHOW with Dr. Lady, the Usual Suspects, and special guest Sluggo presents our all-time favorite Dr. Lady episode -- Jess Franco’s OASIS OF THE ZOMBIES(1981) aka Skull on a Stick. The movie is about an expedition searching for gold hidden by Field Marshall Rommel that comes up against an army of Nazi Zombies. But what really makes tonight's show completely off-the-wall are its hilarious skits, several of which feature our own Pink Lady.

MISTY BREW'S CREATURE FEATURE presents The Vortexx premiere of THE HAUNTING OF JULIA (1977).

Sunday (2/189). 9:00 P.M. (ET) MISTY BREW'S CREATURE FEATURE presents The Vortexx premiere of THE HAUNTING OF JULIA (1977) aka Full Circle. Mia Farrow (sporting her Rosemary's Baby haircut) stars in this British-made thriller as a wealthy American woman named . . . you guessed it, Julia. She's living in London, trapped in an unhappy marriage, and haunted by the sadness of losing her child. Julia decides to ditch her hubby and move into a new house, which happens to be inhabited by the ghost of an obnoxious little girl who plans to use Julia as a pawn in her terrible revenge scheme. Unlike most of the foreign movies that sat on the shelf for years before being released in America, this one, based on the novel by Peter Straub who also wrote Ghost Story, is actually pretty good. And it's got a shocking and completely unexpected ending. Keir (2001: A Space Odyssey) Dullea costars. Note: Tonight's show will be followed by an encore presentation of Wednesday's SCREAMING SOUP: EVIL TOONS.













HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO SLUGGO!!! OUR DEAR LEADER AND FREELY RE-ELECTED PRESIDENT OF THE VORTEXX!!!

Posted by Alan Smithee in HOSTED HORROR, STAFF PICKS, 0 comments
VORTEXX SCHEDULE FOR DECEMBER 4 – 11, 2016

VORTEXX SCHEDULE FOR DECEMBER 4 – 11, 2016


By The Crimson Executioner
&
Woofer McWooferson

Welcome to The Vortexx where it's been ALL HOSTS ALL THE TIME FOR SIX YEARS!

Welcome to The Vortexx where it's ALL HOSTS ALL THE TIME! We've got a terrific line-up of shows, hosts, and movies coming up this week for your viewing and chatting pleasure, with one great new movie making its Vortexx debut along with several returning favorites. Our hosts are Arachna of the Spider People & Deadly, Movie House Ron, Riggor Mortiss & Nyte Angel, Freakshow & the Bordello gang, Dr. Sigmund Zoid & Sluggo, Mr. Lobo, Dr. Lady & The Usual Suspects, Lord Blood-Rah, and Misty Brew. Enjoy the shows and thanks for hanging out!

CHRISTMAS DADDY will make all your Christmas wishes come true!

Christmas is little more than a month away, and that means our very own bearer of Yuletide gifts CHRISTMAS DADDY will be coming to The Vortexx soon to make your Christmas wishes come true. A new slack module . . . a membership in the Puppy of the Month Club . . . a Dr Lady action figure . . . a singing Sluggo plushie that also does lap dances. . . . Those are just a few of the wonderful gifts that Christmas Daddy has given to our viewers in years past. Whatever your wish may be this year, just send an e-mail to Christmas Daddy at The Vortexx North Pole and he'll do his very best to make it happen. You can reach Christmas Daddy at christmasdaddy@horrorhost.net

BEWARE THEATER presents Ed Wood's PLAN 9 FROM OUTER SPACE (1959)

Sunday (12/4). 9:00 P.M. (ET) BEWARE THEATER with Arachna of the Spider People presents another gem from the golden age of black-and-white -- Ed Wood's PLAN 9 FROM OUTER SPACE (1959). A couple of pompous aliens in silk pajamas (Dudley Manlove and Joanna Lee) and their leader The Ruler (Bunny Breckinridge) plan to resurrect Bela Lugosi, Vampira, and Tor Johnson as slow moving zombies. Why? Because all you of Earth are idiots, that's why! Bela died shortly before shooting began, so Ed used some footage he had of Bela, wrote a script around it, and persuaded his wife's chiropractor (Tom Mason) to shoot the rest of the scenes with a cape hiding his face. Did he really think no one would notice? We're sure Arachna is going to have a lot of fun with this post-Thanksgiving turkey!

MOVIE HOUSE HOT TAKE presents SHUT IN (2016)

Please Note: Arachna's show will be preceded by a MOVIE HOUSE HOT TAKE with Ron Purtee. Tonight Ron takes a few moments to talk about the Canadian-made thriller SHUT IN (2016) starring Naomi Watts.

RIGGOR MORTISS PRESENTS presents Mario Bava's THE MASK OF SATAN (1960)

Monday (12/5). 9:00 P.M. (ET) RIGGOR MORTISS PRESENTS with Riggor and Nyte Angel presents Mario Bava's THE MASK OF SATAN (1960). Scream queen Barbara Steele plays a dual role as a vengeful witch who returns from the grave and the beautiful descendant whose body she wants to possess. On a personal note, Riggor is suffering from a cancerous tumor and needs help paying his medical bills. We hope that all who enjoy tonight's episode of Riggor Mortiss Presents will show their appreciation for this great host and this great show by making a donation to Riggor's GoFundMe page. No donation is too small!

BORDELLO OF HORROR presents DEVIL TIMES FIVE (1974)

Tuesday (12/6). 9:00 P.M. (ET) BORDELLO OF HORROR presents DEVIL TIMES FIVE (1974). Five psycho kids escape from a mental hospital and proceed to terrorize and kill a group of adults on a winter vacation at a remote mountain ski lodge. Hammers, axes, chains, and even a piranha and a snowman are all involved in the carnage. Boss Hogg (Sorrell Booke) plays one of the adults; former child actor Leif Garrett is one of the psycho kids. This is Mistress Malicious's debut show, folks, so don't miss it! In addition to the movie, Freakshow will be presenting musical guest DR.CHUD's X-Ward, a movie review by Mark The Movie Maniac from The Final Cut, and more!

ALTERNATIVE REALITIES presents WAR OF THE MONSTERS (1966)

Wednesday (12/7). 9:00 P.M. (ET) Thanksgiving may be officially over but were bringing it back tonight with the ALTERNATIVE REALITIES THANKSGIVING SHOW! Tonight Dr. Zoid and Sluggo are hosting WAR OF THE MONSTERS (1966) aka Gamera vs. Barugon, which first aired in The Vortexx as a special Thanksgiving episode on November 29, 2013. Gamera the Flying Turtle goes mano a mano against Barugon, the Demon Dog from Hell, in this second entry in the popular Gamera series. Needless to say, Tokyo takes its usual beating before Gamera finally saves the day.

CINEMA INSOMNIA WITH MR. LOBO presents Dario Argento's DEEP RED (1975)

Thursday (12/8). 9:00 P.M. (ET) CINEMA INSOMNIA WITH MR. LOBO presents Dario Argento's DEEP RED (1975). This stylish and imaginative shocker by the master of Italian horror was released a year before Suspiria. David Hemmings stars as an Englishman in Rome who witnesses a murder and then teams up with a feisty reporter to find the killer. He finds many of his avenues of inquiry cut off by new murders and begins to wonder how the murderer can track his movements so closely.

THE LATE DR. LADY SHOW presents Michael Winner's THE SENTINEL (1977)

Friday (12/9). 9:00 P.M. (ET) THE LATE DR. LADY SHOW with Dr. Lady and the Usual Suspects returns to The Vortexx to present Michael Winner's THE SENTINEL (1977). John Carradine plays a mute priest who guards the gates of Hell in this supernatural thriller, which also stars Chris (Fright Night) Sarandon, Cristina Raines, and Burgess Meredith. An all-star supporting cast includes Martin (Psycho) Balsam, Tom Berenger, Beverly D'Angelo, Richard Dreyfuss, Jose Ferrer, Ava Gardner, Jeff Goldblum, Arthur Kennedy, Jerry Orbach, Eli Wallach, and Christopher Walken. This movie generated some controversy when it was discovered that Winner had used real human oddities to play the misshapen characters in the memorable concluding scene.

LORD BLOOD-RAH'S NERVE WRACKIN' THEATRE presents ATTACK FROM SPACE (1964)

Saturday (12/10). 9:00 P.M. (ET) LORD BLOOD-RAH'S NERVE WRACKIN' THEATRE presents ATTACK FROM SPACE (1964). Paunchy superhero Starman must once again rescue the Earth -- this time from an invasion by an evil alien race called the Spherions. Dubbed and re-edited from the Super Giant featurettes of the late 1950s, this is an entertaining Japanese cheese fest with many unintended laughs. And we can depend on Lord Blood-Rah to liven things up with movie trailers, trivia, and other cool stuff, including we hope a cranial cavity search.

MISTY BREW'S CREATURE FEATURE presents The Vortexx premiere of Arthur Conan Doyle's THE HOUND OF THE BASKERVILLES (1939)

Sunday (12/11). 9:00 P.M. (ET) MISTY BREW'S CREATURE FEATURE presents The Vortexx premiere of Arthur Conan Doyle's THE HOUND OF THE BASKERVILLES (1939). The game is afoot tonight as Basil Rathbone and Nigel Bruce star in the first (and arguably the best) of the fourteen movies that they would make together as Sherlock Holmes and his bumbling sidekick Dr. Watson between 1939 and 1946. Richard Greene (who received top billing when the movie was released) co-stars as Sir Henry Baskerville, the heir to the cursed Baskerville estate. Cast members under suspicion include horror veterans Lionel Atwill as Dr. James Mortimer and John Carradine as Barryman the butler. Misty's show will be preceded by a MOVIE HOUSE HOT TAKE with Ron Purtee. Tonight Ron takes a few moments to talk about Kevin Smith's new horror-comedy YOGA HOSERS (2016).













SLUGGO!!! OUR DEAR LEADER AND FREELY RE-ELECTED PRESIDENT OF THE VORTEXX!!!

Posted by Alan Smithee in HOSTED HORROR, 0 comments
VORTEXX SCHEDULE FOR 11 – 18 SEPTEMBER 2016

VORTEXX SCHEDULE FOR 11 – 18 SEPTEMBER 2016

VORTEXX SCHEDULE FOR
11 – 18 SEPTEMBER 2016

By The Crimson Executioner
&
Woofer McWooferson

The Vortexx Hosts_02

Welcome to THE VORTEXX where it's ALL HOSTS ALL THE TIME FOR SIX YEARS!

Welcome to The Vortexx where it's been ALL HOSTS ALL THE TIME FOR SIX YEARS! We've got another great line-up of shows, hosts, and movies for your viewing and chatting pleasure including THREE indie movies marking their Vortexx debut along with several returning favorites starring Bela Lugosi, Tor Johnson, and Spider-Gary. Our hosts this week are Arachna of the Spider People & Deadly, Vincent Grimmly, Freakshow & the Bordello gang, Dr. Lady & the Usual Suspects, Bobby Gammonster & Boris the Buzzard with guest host Vincent Grimmly, Mr. Lobo, Lord Blood-Rah, and Misty Brew. Enjoy the shows and thanks for hanging out!

Vortexx-Bride of the Monster-20160911_Beware Theater

Sunday (9/11) @ 9:00 P.M. (ET)
BEWARE THEATER
presents
The Vortexx premiere of
Ed Wood's BRIDE OF THE MONSTER (1955)

BEWARE THEATER with Arachna of the Spider People and her friend Deadly presents another gem from the Golden Age of Black-and-White -- Ed Wood's BRIDE OF THE MONSTER (1955). In his last starring role, an emaciated Bela Lugosi plays an aging mad scientist with a plan to create a race of supermen with the help of Tor Johnson. Bela shows off his acting chops in his memorable "Home, I Have No Home" soliloquy, and the final scene where he wrestles with a rubber octopus must be seen in order to be believed.

vortexx-beast-of-yucca-flats-20160912_night-chills

Monday (9/12) @ 9:00 P.M. (ET)
NIGHT CHILLS THEATRE
presents
THE BEAST OF YUCCA FLATS (1961)

Join us tonight as NIGHT CHILLS THEATRE with Vincent Grimmly returns to The Vortexx for its second appearance. Vincent and his pet raven Phydeaux will be hosting Coleman (Red Zone Cuba) Francis's masterpiece THE BEAST OF YUCCA FLATS (1961). Tor Johnson gets to show his acting range, playing a defecting Russian rocket scientist named Joseph Javorsky. Pursued by KGB agents, Javorsky stumbles onto a nuclear testing site in the Nevada wastelands, gets wasted, and becomes . . . you guessed it . . . Tor Johnson! Director Francis, who also narrates, provides plenty of unintended laughs with lines such as "once a brilliant scientist, now just fatty grease for the wheels of progress." Francis, who bears more than a passing resemblance to Curly of The 3 Stooges, also appears briefly as a gas station attendant and as a man buying a newspaper. We're hoping that Vincent's sidekick Phydeaux will be more talkative tonight than he was in last week's episode.

vortexx-monstroid-20160913_bordello

Tuesday (9/13) @ 9:00 P.M. (ET)
BORDELLO OF HORROR
presents
The Vortexx premiere of
MONSTROID: IT CAME FROM THE LAKE (1980)

BORDELLO OF HORROR with Freakshow, Mistress Malicious, Sgt. Drizzlepuss, Ali Katt, and Marijohuana presents The Vortexx premiere of MONSTROID: IT CAME FROM THE LAKE (1980). This low-budget indie, supposedly based on a true story, is about a rural Colombian village that is attacked by a sea serpent who's been aroused by the industrial pollution of a nearby lake. For an indie it's got a surprising number of "name" actors, including John Carradine playing a local priest who believes the monster is sent by God to punish sinners. Jim Mitchum (the spitting image of his more famous dad), Philip Carey (who played Texas tycoon Asa Buchanan for almost three decades on the popular soap opera One Life to Live), and veteran B-movie actor Anthony Eisley round out the cast. Carradine, whose contempt for this movie can be seen on his scowling face, reportedly said, "This is the worst piece of s--t I've ever worked on and I've worked on a lot of pieces of s--t." In addition to the movie, Freaky will be entertaining us with special musical guests The Malcolmexicans, a movie review by Mark Krawczyk from The Final Cut, and more!

vortexx-suspira-20160914_dr-lady

Wednesday (9/14) @ 9:00 P.M. (ET)
THE LATE DR. LADY SHOW
presents
Dario Argento's SUSPIRIA (1976)

THE LATE DR. LADY SHOW with Dr David Lady and the Usual Suspects presents Dario Argento's SUSPIRIA (1976). A young girl (Jessica Harper) arrives at a fancy ballet academy run by a coven of witches in this stylish Italian thriller. Joan Bennett and Alida Valli -- both major stars in their heyday -- co-star as the school's directress Madame Blanc and her Nazified assistant Miss Tanner. Cult actor Udo Kier, best known for his lead roles in Andy Warhol's Frankenstein and Andy Warhol's Dracula, appears in a small supporting role. The shocks are plentiful, including a room full of barbed wire and maggots falling from the ceiling. And we guarantee, the sound track by Goblin is the loudest you'll ever hear.

vortexx-horrors-of-spider-island-20160915_monster-movie-night

Thursday (9/15) @ 9:00 P.M. (ET)
MONSTER MOVIE NIGHT
presents
HORRORS OF SPIDER ISLAND (1962)

MONSTER MOVIE NIGHT with Bobby Gammonster, Boris The Buzzard, and special guest host Vincent Grimmly presents a Vortexx favorite -- HORRORS OF SPIDER ISLAND (1962). It's about a troupe of beautiful dancers who find themselves stranded on a deserted island with their square-shouldered manager Gary (Alex D'Arcy). Their skinny-dipping routine is disrupted when Gary gets bit by a spider and becomes . . . . Spider-Gary! Oh, the horrors of it all! Vincent appears in tonight's episode, live from Castle Pappdeckel, via Bobby's video scream-o-phone.

vortexx-mark-of-the-damned-20160916_cinema-insomnia

Friday (9/16) @ 9:00 P.M. (ET)
CINEMA INSOMNIA WITH MR. LOBO
presents
The Vortexx premiere of
MARK OF THE DAMNED (2006)

We're celebrating Halloween early tonight as CINEMA INSOMNIA WITH MR. LOBO presents the first part of a two-part Halloween Special from 2009. Mr. Lobo will be hosting The Vortexx premiere of Eric Miller's MARK OF THE DAMNED (2006). Miller's homegrown Midnight Movie masterpiece was made as an homage to the classic Santo movies such as Santo vs the Vampire Women (1962). It's set in a place called The Amplified World and it's filled with vampires, ghouls, robots, rocket men, masked heroes, and over-the-top villains like The Vampire Queen. In addition to the movie, Mr. Lobo will be spicing up the mix with off-beat humor, vintage TV ads, drive-in movie trailers, retro craziness, and informative interviews on location in Richmond, Virginia, detailing the making of the movie. In addition, there is a hilarious musical cooking segment with November Fire recording artist Slob Zombie and a taste of his hit single "40 Hour Weekend."

vortexx-daughter-of-horror-20160917_lord-blood-rah

Saturday (9/17) @ 9:00 P.M. (ET)
LORD BLOOD-RAH'S
NERVE WRACKIN' THEATRE

presents
DAUGHTER OF HORROR (1957)

LORD BLOOD-RAH'S NERVE WRACKIN' THEATRE presents DAUGHTER OF HORROR (1957). This "film noir" of a psychotic young woman's nightmarish experiences during one night on skid row was originally released in 1955 as Dementia with no dialogue whatsoever. It was re-released in 1957 with added narration by Johnny Carson's second banana, Ed McMahon. The cast includes Bruno (Fat Dave) VeSota, little person Angelo Rossitto, Jonathan (Seymour Krelborn) Haze, and comedian Shelley Berman. As always there will be plenty of movie trailers and other cool extras along with a Cranial Cavity Search.

vortexx-dark-garden-20160918_misty-brew

Sunday (9/18) @ 9:00 P.M. (ET)
MISTY BREW'S CREATURE FEATURE
presents
The Vortexx premiere of
DARK GARDEN (2004)

MISTY BREW'S CREATURE FEATURE presents The Vortexx premiere of DARK GARDEN (2004), a cool indie film by Patrick Bond. It's a psychological thriller about a downtrodden man named Warren (Kyle Van Pool), who finds himself having to choose between good and evil when he moves into a new house and befriends Harry (J.W. McCrary), who soon recruits Warren to assist him in his wicked ways. In addition to the movie, Misty will be entertaining us with a special interview with Mr. McCrary and previews of Misty's Coming Attractions.

✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿

Welcome to The Vortexx where it's ALL HOSTS ALL THE TIME!

The Vortexx - heart"Every day is a good day that ends in The Vortexx." You can find us at horrorhost.net and livestream.com/allhorrorhosts. Remember folks, we're the Gooble Gobble Channel. We accept everyone. And we will keep the doors open as long as you keep coming around! If you're a horror host looking for an additional outlet for your show, email Sluggo at sluggo@horrorhost.net.

The Vortexx - Bloody Pit of Health Fitness Centers

If you don't get the results you're looking for within the eight weeks of the program, The Azure Executioner guarantees that he will personally throw you into his exclusive vat of acid!
Introducing our newest sponsor -- Bloody Pit of Health! Want to eliminate those things that interfere with the harmony of your perfect body? The Bloody Pit has all the latest fitness equipment -- weight room, Olympic-sized pool, and even a spider room. To find the location nearest you, visit their website www.clubdesade.com

The Vortexx - Mummy Fart

Available in three convenient sizes!
Mummy Fart! The perfect product to get those pleasant smells out of your tomb. Available in three convenient sizes!

The Vortexx - Kurt Pasakivi's Used Car Emporium

If you're interested, just e-mail us for Kurt's current location.
Kurt Pasakivi's Used Car Emporium! At Kurt's Emporium you can buy the car of your dreams for a deep discount. If you see a car on the street that you like, just send Kurt a photo of the car and the license plate, and he'll negotiate with the owner and sell it to you at a steal!

The Vortexx - Executioner's Ale

The Official Beers of The Vortexx!
Executioner's Ale! A bloody good red ale crafted in the torture chamber of the Crimson Executioner. Sock Stout! The sock with the hops. A thick and creamy head just for you. [Sock Stout is a trademark of Raen, used with permission.]

The Vortexx - Amazon Andy

Amazon Andy is the creation of Nick Polotta, a very gifted writer and comedian who, sadly, passed away on April 13, 2013.

Totino's Pizza Rolls, Crimson Royal Jelly, and Amazon Andy's Southern Fried Tarantula Legs! The original sponsors of The Vortexx!

The Vortexx Skull Cornbread

The Official Food of The Vortexx!
Skull Cornbread! The official food of The Vortexx, served piping hot from the oven of the Crimson Executioner.

The Vortexx - Chia Host

BORDELLO OF HORROR with Freakshow airs Tuesday at 9 (ET)

Chia Host! The latest sensation from Mushnick Florists. You can see him every Tuesday night in The Vortexx!

The Vortexx - Chilly Dilly

Two delicious pickle treats!

Chilly Dilly! A delicious pickle treat that's spiced just right for every bite. And now you can "pucker up" with the all-new Chilly Dilly Lip Balm!

The Vortexx - Egg Bleach

Jason "Egg" Brown was an integral part of The Vortexx as a staff member and long-time viewer until his passing on June 27, 2016. Jason may have departed this Earth, but he will live forever in The Vortexx.

"Now that's a product I can really GET BEHIND!" -- Egg.

Egg Bleach! The all-purpose antiseptic for treatment of cuts, scratches, and abrasions. And now you can touch up those "intimate" parts of your body with the all-new Egg Anal Bleach!

The Vortexx - President Sluggo

SLUGGO!!! OUR DEAR LEADER AND FREELY ELECTED PRESIDENT OF THE VORTEXX!!!

Posted by Alan Smithee in HOSTED HORROR, 0 comments
VORTEXX SCHEDULE FOR 14 – 21 AUGUST 2016

VORTEXX SCHEDULE FOR 14 – 21 AUGUST 2016

VORTEXX SCHEDULE FOR
14 - 21 AUGUST 2016

By The Crimson Executioner
&
Woofer McWooferson

The Vortexx Hosts_02

Welcome to THE VORTEXX where it's ALL HOSTS ALL THE TIME!

We've got a great line-up of shows, hosts, and movies this week for your viewing and chatting pleasure with two new movies -- and one great host -- making their Vortexx debut. Our hosts this week are Arachna of the Spider People & Deadly, Bobby Gammonster & Boris The Buzzard plus special guest Danvers, Freakshow & the Bordello gang, Dr. Tarr & Prof. Fether, Dr. Lady & the Usual Suspects, Master Vyle, Misty Brew, and (making his Vortexx debut) Sicko Psychotic. Check out the schedule for details about all the fine shows airing this week in The Vortexx. Enjoy the shows and thanks for hanging out!

Vortexx-Cat Women of the Moon-20160814_Beware Theater

Sunday (8/14) @ 9:00 P.M. (ET)
BEWARE THEATER
presents
The Vortexx premiere of
CAT WOMEN OF THE MOON (1953)

Arachna of the Spider People and her friend Deadly present another gem from the Golden Age of Black & White -- CAT WOMEN OF THE MOON (1953). A group of astronauts, led by Sonny Tufts, travel to the moon where they discover it is inhabited by attractive young women in black tights and heavy eye makeup with names like Alpha, Beta, and Lambda. Little do they know that these catty gals are up to no good -- they plan to hijack the space ship! And for those who just didn't enough arachnid action last week, there's also a giant spider. Veteran bad-guy Victor Jory plays one of the astronauts. Marie Windsor, who is miscast as the sole female astronaut, reportedly said that that this was the only film she was ashamed of. Soon-to-be-famous composer Elmer Bernstein, who did the score, is misspelled in the title credits as "Elmer Bernstien."
Vortexx-Awful Allan-20160815_Gammonster

Monday (8/15) @ 9:00 P.M. (ET)
MONSTER MOVIE NIGHT
presents
HOW AWFUL ABOUT ALLAN (1970)

MONSTER MOVIE NIGHT with Bobby Gammonster, Boris The Buzzard and special guest Danvers from Demented Features presents HOW AWFUL ABOUT ALLAN (1970). Anthony Perkins (not known for playing stable types) stars as a guilt-ridden, semi-blind mental patient who is released from the hospital to stay with his equally whacked-out sister (Julie Harris from The Haunting), who proceeds to torment him. Also starring Joan Hackett and veteran B-movie actor Kent Smith.

Vortexx-Ninja Death II-20160809_Bordello

Tuesday (8/16) @ 9:00 P.M. (ET)
BORDELLO OF HORROR'S
NINJULY IN AUGUST

presents
NINJA DEATH 2 (1987)

Welcome to BORDELLO OF HORROR'S NINJULY IN AUGUST! Tonight Freakshow & friends will be presenting the second installment of their month-long series of martial arts films -- NINJA DEATH 2 (1987). Tonight's movie chronicles the continuing adventures of Tiger and "Master," as they battle the evil forces of The Grand Master. "Master" has been training Tiger long and hard for the fight against the invaders from Japan and has finally revealed the secrets behind his origin and his ties to the Grand Master. Armed with this knowledge and his new-found skills, Tiger must set out to defeat the forces of The Grand Master once and for all. Of course, we know that ain't gonna happen because there's a Ninja Death 3 coming our way next week. In addition to the movie, Freaky will be entertaining us with special musical guests Winning Ugly, and more! [Rescheduled from last week.]

Vortexx-Carnival Souls-201608017_Tarr & FetherWednesday (8/17) @ 9:00 P.M. (ET)
TARR & FETHER'S PSYCHO CINEMA
presents
CARNIVAL OF SOULS (1962)

TARR & FETHER'S PSYCHO CINEMA presents Herk Harvey's CARNIVAL OF SOULS (1962). Shot on a budget of $33,000 and largely ignored at the time of its release, this film has since become a cult classic. Reminiscent in many ways of an elongated Twilight Zone episode, it relies more on atmosphere than on special effects to create a mood of unease and foreboding. Candace Hilligoss stars as Mary Henry, a young lady who survives a car accident and becomes drawn to a mysterious abandoned carnival. Director Harvey appears (uncredited) as the pale man who is stalking Mary.

Vortexx-Horror Hotel-201608018_Master Vyle

Thursday (8/18) @ 9:00 P.M. (ET)
HOUSE OF MASTER VYLE
presents
HORROR HOTEL (1960)

HOUSE OF MASTER VYLE PRESENTS with Master Vyle, Queman, and a cast of thousands presents HORROR HOTEL (1960) aka City of the Dead. A 300-year-old witch needs annual virgin sacrifices in order sustain her immortality, and virgins are getting harder and harder to find! Starring Christopher Lee and directed by John Llewellyn Moxey (Night Stalker), this chilling tale about witchcraft in a small New England town was released in the same year as Psycho and has been compared to that film in several ways.

Vortexx-Snowbeast-201608019_Dr Lady

Friday (8/19) @ 9:00 P.M. (ET)
THE LATE DR LADY SHOW
presents
SNOWBEAST (1977)

It's back by popular demand! Tonight we celebrate the birthday of one of our longtime chatters (and longtime president of The Crimson Executioner Fan Club) with her favorite movie. Join us tonight as THE LATE DR LADY SHOW with Dr. Lady and the Usual Suspects presents SNOWBEAST (1977) starring Bo Svenson, Clint Walker, Yvette Mimieux, and Sylvia Sidney. Big bad Bigfoot (well, actually his distant cousin) terrorizes a ski resort during a winter carnival, killing all of those folks who aren't wearing ugly hats and completely disrupting the Snow Queen ceremony. In addition to the movie, we will also be watching photos & videos of our chatters in their favorite ugly hats. [Movie poster by Sean Hartter courtesy of Saturday Fright Special.]

Vortexx-Bloody Pit of Horror-201608020_Sicko Psychotic

Saturday (8/20) @ 9:00 P.M. (ET)
SICKO-PSYCHOTIC
presents
BLOODY PIT OF HORROR (1965)

Join us tonight as we welcome SICKO-PSYCHOTIC to the Vortexx! Sadistically sinister and ostentatiously outrageous, Sicko-Psychotic, King of Ghoulz, is a horror host based in Las Vegas, Nevada. Accompanied by a lascivious pet spider named Silky Harlot, the ol' ghoul presents schlock films on his freakish series, which is appropriately titled Sicko-Psychotic. Forced to project Sicko's favorite horror and trash flicks is a contemptuous talking camera obscura nicknamed "Cameo". During the movie breaks, the terrible threesome engage in wicked shenanigans which are further enhanced by loony relatives, bizarre acquaintances, and other colorful guests who drop into the Sick-Shack unexpectedly. Tonight Sicko and his co-hosts will be presenting a movie that needs no introduction -- BLOODY PIT OF HORROR (1965) starring Mickey Hargitay as The Crimson Executioner. Sicko promises that he will be lurking in the live chat room during the show. Perhaps some of our chatters can draw him out!

Vortexx-Cape & Shining-201608021_Misty Brew

Sunday (8/21) @ 9:00 P.M. (ET)
MISTY BREW'S CREATURE FEATURE DOUBLE FEATURE!
presents
The Vortexx premiere of
2015 CAPE-COMIC CON HIGHLIGHTS
and
MISTY BREW SPOOFS THE SHINING

Join us tonight for a MISTY BREW'S CREATURE FEATURE DOUBLE FEATURE! First up Misty will be entertaining us with highlights from the 2015 CAPE-COMIC CON in Cape Girardeau Mo. at which she was a featured guest. Held on April 17-19, 2015, the Cape-Comic Con featured three days of professional comic book artists, publishers, and over one hundred tables of comics, toys, and collectibles as well as a variety of gaming tournaments, a juried art show, and fans from all over the region who came in costume to celebrate the event. Then be sure to stick around for MISTY BREW SPOOFS THE SHINING as Misty and special guests and Sissy and Missy Brew have some fun with the classic Stephen King novel. Included is a generous serving of clips from Stanley Kubrick's 1980 movie starring Jack Nicholson and Shelley Duvall (screenplay by Kubrick) and the 1997 TV miniseries starring Steven Weber and Rebecca De Mornay (screenplay by King).

✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿

Welcome to The Vortexx where it's ALL HOSTS ALL THE TIME!

The Vortexx - Swirling Storm"Every day is a good day that ends in The Vortexx." You can find us at horrorhost.net and livestream.com/allhorrorhosts. Remember folks, we're the Gooble Gobble Channel. We accept everyone. And we will keep the doors open as long as you keep coming around! If you're a horror host looking for an additional outlet for your show, email Sluggo at sluggo@horrorhost.net.

The Vortexx - Bloody Pit of Health Fitness Centers

If you don't get the results you're looking for within the eight weeks of the program, The Azure Executioner guarantees that he will personally throw you into his exclusive vat of acid!
Introducing our newest sponsor -- Bloody Pit of Health! Want to eliminate those things that interfere with the harmony of your perfect body? The Bloody Pit has all the latest fitness equipment -- weight room, Olympic-sized pool, and even a spider room. To find the location nearest you, visit their website www.clubdesade.com

The Vortexx - Mummy Fart

Available in three convenient sizes!
Mummy Fart! The perfect product to get those pleasant smells out of your tomb. Available in three convenient sizes!

The Vortexx - Kurt Pasakivi's Used Car Emporium

If you're interested, just e-mail us for Kurt's current location.
Kurt Pasakivi's Used Car Emporium! At Kurt's Emporium you can buy the car of your dreams for a deep discount. If you see a car on the street that you like, just send Kurt a photo of the car and the license plate, and he'll negotiate with the owner and sell it to you at a steal!

The Vortexx - Executioner's Ale

The Official Beers of The Vortexx!
Executioner's Ale! A bloody good red ale crafted in the torture chamber of the Crimson Executioner. Sock Stout! The sock with the hops. A thick and creamy head just for you. [Sock Stout is a trademark of Raen, used with permission.]

The Vortexx - Amazon Andy

Amazon Andy is the creation of Nick Polotta, a very gifted writer and comedian who, sadly, passed away on April 13, 2013.

Totino's Pizza Rolls, Crimson Royal Jelly, and Amazon Andy's Southern Fried Tarantula Legs! The original sponsors of The Vortexx!

The Vortexx Skull Cornbread

The Official Food of The Vortexx!
Skull Cornbread! The official food of The Vortexx, served piping hot from the oven of the Crimson Executioner.

The Vortexx - Chia Host

BORDELLO OF HORROR with Freakshow airs Tuesday at 9 (ET)

Chia Host! The latest sensation from Mushnick Florists. You can see him every Tuesday night in The Vortexx!

The Vortexx - Chilly Dilly

Two delicious pickle treats!

Chilly Dilly! A delicious pickle treat that's spiced just right for every bite. And now you can "pucker up" with the all-new Chilly Dilly Lip Balm!

The Vortexx - Egg Bleach

Jason "Egg" Brown was an integral part of The Vortexx as a staff member and long-time viewer until his passing on June 27, 2016. Jason may have departed this Earth, but he will live forever in The Vortexx.

"Now that's a product I can really GET BEHIND!" -- Egg.

Egg Bleach! The all-purpose antiseptic for treatment of cuts, scratches, and abrasions. And now you can touch up those "intimate" parts of your body with the all-new Egg Anal Bleach!

Vortexx - Slugnado

SLUGGO!!! OUR DEAR LEADER AND FREELY ELECTED PRESIDENT OF

Posted by Alan Smithee in HOSTED HORROR, 0 comments
VORTEXX SCHEDULE FOR 31 JULY – 07 AUGUST 2016

VORTEXX SCHEDULE FOR 31 JULY – 07 AUGUST 2016

VORTEXX SCHEDULE FOR
31 JULY - 07 AUGUST 2016

By The Crimson Executioner
&
Woofer McWooferson

The Vortexx Hosts_02

Welcome to THE VORTEXX where it's ALL HOSTS ALL THE TIME!

We've got a great line-up of shows, hosts, and movies for your viewing and chatting pleasure, including the first exciting episode of NinJuly in August -- a series of martial arts films airing each Tuesday during the month of August on BORDELLO OF HORROR. Check out the schedule for details about all the fine shows airing this week in The Vortexx. Our hosts are Arachna of the Spider People & Deadly, The Bone Jangler and Master Gregory, Freakshow & the Bordello gang, Dr. Lady and the Usual Suspects, Penny Dreadful & Garou, Lord Blood-Rah, The Bone Ranger & Tombstone (aka Cnl. Graves & Smiley Bones), and (making her second appearance in The Vortexx) Misty Brew. Enjoy the shows and thanks for hanging out!

Vortexx-Nightmare Castle-20160731_Beware Theater

Sunday (7/31) @ 9:00 P.M. (ET)
BEWARE THEATER
presents

NIGHTMARE CASTLE (1965)

Arachna of the Spider People and her friend Deadly go to a European spa from hell tonight as BEWARE THEATER presents another gem from the Golden Age of Black & White -- NIGHTMARE CASTLE (1965). Scream queen Barbara Steele stars as a faithless wife whose husband (Paul Muller from Lady Frankenstein) decides that revenge is a dish best served not only cold -- but heartless. Unfortunately for hubby, his plans for his deceased wife's inheritance are complicated when her wacko sister (Steele in a blonde wig) shows up. As the poster says, see it with someone who’s shockproof. This one is definitely not for the squeamish.

Vortexx-Daytime Dungeon-20160801_Bone Jangler

Monday (8/1) @ 9:00 P.M. (ET)
BONE JANGLER
AND
MASTER GREGORY

present
THE BONE JANGLER'S
DAYTIME DUNGEON
DOUBLE FEATURE

Join us tonight for THE BONE JANGLER'S DAYTIME DUNGEON DOUBLE FEATURE! This great show, hosted by The Bone Jangler and Master Gregory, has been around since 2005. It's aimed at an all-ages audience, and each episode is chock full of classic cartoons, nostalgic music videos, vintage toy commercials, and other family-friendly entertainment. Abbott & Costello and Bugs Bunny will be among the highlights in tonight's episodes, one of which features a very young Master Gregory.

Vortexx-Ninja Death I-20160802_Bordello

Tuesday (8/2) @ 9:00 P.M. (ET)
BORDELLO OF HORROR'S
NINJULY IN AUGUST

presents
NINJA DEATH 1 (1987)

Tonight Freakshow & the Bordello gang will be presenting the first in a series of crappy but fun Taiwanese martial arts films that ran last month as NinJuly on cable channel 57 in Madison, Wisconsin. We kick off the series with NINJA DEATH 1 (1987) aka Venom of the Ninja -- a near-perfect onslaught of ridiculous fight scenes, crazy costumes, topless babes, hilarious dubbing, and a surprisingly intriguing story. Martial arts champion-turned-actor Alexander Rei Lo stars as Tiger, the owner of a brothel who moonlights as a kung fu artist under the watchful eye of a guy named (what else?) "Master." It's all fun and games until some ninjas inexplicably show up and jeopardize Tiger's

Vortexx-Night of the Blood Beast-20160803_Dr. LadyWednesday (8/3) @ 9:00 P.M. (ET)
THE LATE DR. LADY SHOW
presents
NIGHT OF THE BLOOD BEAST (1958)

presents .
In this poor man's Quatermass Xperiment, an astronaut returns to Earth dead. His corpse is revived by an ugly crusty alien who likes to decapitate people. The alien invests his body with what appear to be sea monkeys. Look closely, and you will see in one of the shots that the alien is wearing shoes. One of three movies produced by Gene Corman, Roger's less-talented brother.

Vortexx-Beast of Hollow Mountain-20160806_Public Domain Drive-In

Thursday (8/4) @ 9:00 P.M. (ET)
PENNY DREADFUL'S SHILLING SHOCKERS
presents
THE SHE-BEAST (1965)

We welcome back PENNY DREADFUL'S SHILLING SHOCKERS with the very first episode we ever aired in The Vortexx! Entitled Reverse the Curse, it has Penny hosting Michael Reeves's THE SHE-BEAST (1965) as she works to reverse a strange curse she accidentally placed upon herself many decades ago. Through a series of flashbacks spanning nearly 700 years, Penny reveals short glimpses of her mysterious past and leaves the viewers with a special little "treat" (or is that a trick?) of her own. Meanwhile, in tonight's movie, scream queen Barbara Steele stars as a tourist in Transylvania possessed by the spirit of an ugly, vengeful witch -- quite the antithesis of tonight's charming host! Mel (Gravis Mushnick) Welles co-stars as a horny innkeeper aptly named Groper.

Vortexx-White Zombie-20160805_Lord Blood-Rah

Friday (8/5) @ 9:00 P.M. (ET)
LORD BLOOD-RAH'S NERVE WRACKIN' THEATRE
presents
WHITE ZOMBIE (1932)

Friday (8/5). 9:00 P.M. (ET). LORD BLOOD-RAH'S NERVE WRACKIN' THEATRE presents starring Bela Lugosi. It's the first zombie movie ever -- and still arguably one of the best! Fresh from his success in Dracula, Lugosi plays the evil Murder Legendre, who can control people with a little white powder, a hand clench, and a nasty glare. In addition to great sets (borrowed from Universal) and lots of living dead (courtesy of master makeup man Jack Pierce), there's some pretty weird music, some of it by Xavier Cugat. As always, Lord Blood-Rah will adding spice to the mix with plenty of movie trailers, a Cranial Cavity Search, and other extras.

Vortexx-Beast of Hollow Mountain-20160806_Public Domain Drive-In

Saturday (8/6) @ 8:00 P.M. (ET)
PUBLIC DOMAIN DRIVE-IN
SUMMER ROUNDUP

presents
THE BEAST OF HOLLOW MOUNTAIN (1956)

PUBLIC DOMAIN DRIVE-IN SUMMER ROUNDUP with Cnl. Graves and Smiley Bones concludes tonight with the third of three action-packed episodes! Tonight our hosts Tombstone Graves and the Bone Ranger are presenting THE BEAST OF HOLLOW MOUNTAIN (1956). It's cowboys versus dinosaurs as Guy Madison (best known as TV's Wild Bill Hickok) goes up against a T-Rex in this offbeat mix of the western and horror genres. Willis O'Brien, the creator of King Kong, came up with the idea, but unfortunately the producers were too cheap to hire him to do the stop-motion animation. Ray Harryhausen would pull off the same story much better a decade later in The Valley of Gwangi. But, hey, when you're limited to public domain fare, this is about as good as it gets in the cowboy-dinosaur genre.

 

Vortexx-Theater of Blood-20160807_Misty Brew

Sunday (8/7) @ 9:00 P.M. (ET)
MISTY BREW'S CREATURE FEATURE
presents
THEATRE OF BLOOD (1973)

Join us tonight as MISTY BREW'S CREATURE FEATURE returns to The Vortexx for its second appearance! Tonight Misty will be presenting Vincent Price in his favorite movie role as she hosts the deliciously campy horror-comedy THEATRE OF BLOOD (1973). Price stars as Shakespearian actor Edward Lionheart, who murders the critics who snubbed him by using famous death scenes from Shakespeare plays (Macbeth, Richard III, etc.) as his models. Diana (The Avengers) Rigg plays his daughter and accomplice. The stellar supporting cast includes Robert Morley & a couple of very unfortunate poodles, Jack Hawkins, Diana Dors, Dennis Price, Milo O'Shea, Robert Coote, and Coral Browne -- an Australian actress whom Price met on the set and married a year later.

✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿

Welcome to The Vortexx where it's ALL HOSTS ALL THE TIME!

The Vortexx - septagons"Every day is a good day that ends in The Vortexx." You can find us at horrorhost.net and livestream.com/allhorrorhosts. Remember folks, we're the Gooble Gobble Channel. We accept everyone. And we will keep the doors open as long as you keep coming around! If you're a horror host looking for an additional outlet for your show, email Sluggo at sluggo@horrorhost.net.

The Vortexx - Bloody Pit of Health Fitness Centers

If you don't get the results you're looking for within the eight weeks of the program, The Azure Executioner guarantees that he will personally throw you into his exclusive vat of acid!
Introducing our newest sponsor -- Bloody Pit of Health! Want to eliminate those things that interfere with the harmony of your perfect body? The Bloody Pit has all the latest fitness equipment -- weight room, Olympic-sized pool, and even a spider room. To find the location nearest you, visit their website www.clubdesade.com

The Vortexx - Mummy Fart

Available in three convenient sizes!
Mummy Fart! The perfect product to get those pleasant smells out of your tomb. Available in three convenient sizes!

The Vortexx - Kurt Pasakivi's Used Car Emporium

If you're interested, just e-mail us for Kurt's current location.
Kurt Pasakivi's Used Car Emporium! At Kurt's Emporium you can buy the car of your dreams for a deep discount. If you see a car on the street that you like, just send Kurt a photo of the car and the license plate, and he'll negotiate with the owner and sell it to you at a steal!

The Vortexx - Executioner's Ale

The Official Beers of The Vortexx!
Executioner's Ale! A bloody good red ale crafted in the torture chamber of the Crimson Executioner. Sock Stout! The sock with the hops. A thick and creamy head just for you. [Sock Stout is a trademark of Raen, used with permission.]

The Vortexx - Amazon Andy

Amazon Andy is the creation of Nick Polotta, a very gifted writer and comedian who, sadly, passed away on April 13, 2013.

Totino's Pizza Rolls, Crimson Royal Jelly, and Amazon Andy's Southern Fried Tarantula Legs! The original sponsors of The Vortexx!

The Vortexx Skull Cornbread

The Official Food of The Vortexx!
Skull Cornbread! The official food of The Vortexx, served piping hot from the oven of the Crimson Executioner.

The Vortexx - Chia Host

BORDELLO OF HORROR with Freakshow airs Tuesday at 9 (ET)

Chia Host! The latest sensation from Mushnick Florists. You can see him every Tuesday night in The Vortexx!

The Vortexx - Chilly Dilly

Two delicious pickle treats!

Chilly Dilly! A delicious pickle treat that's spiced just right for every bite. And now you can "pucker up" with the all-new Chilly Dilly Lip Balm!

The Vortexx - Egg Bleach

Jason "Egg" Brown was an integral part of The Vortexx as a staff member and long-time viewer until his passing on June 27, 2016. Jason may have departed this Earth, but he will live forever in The Vortexx.

"Now that's a product I can really GET BEHIND!" -- Egg.

Egg Bleach! The all-purpose antiseptic for treatment of cuts, scratches, and abrasions. And now you can touch up those "intimate" parts of your body with the all-new Egg Anal Bleach!

Sluggo 04

SLUGGO!!! OUR DEAR LEADER AND FREELY ELECTED PRESIDENT OF THE VORTEXX!!!

Posted by Alan Smithee in HOSTED HORROR, 0 comments

The Vortexx – Hosted Horror: Schedule for 17 July 2016 – 24 July 2016

VORTEXX SCHEDULE FOR
17 - 24 JULY 2016

By The Crimson Executioner
&
Woofer McWooferson

The Vortexx Hosts_02

Welcome to THE VORTEXX where it's ALL HOSTS ALL THE TIME!

Welcome to The Vortexx where it's ALL HOSTS ALL THE TIME!! We've got a great line-up of shows, hosts, and movies for your viewing and chatting pleasure, with three movies, along with one great host, making their Vortexx debut. And check out the schedule to learn the identity of our newest Vortexx chat host! Our hosts this week are The Bone Jangler, Nocturna & HARMony; Lord Blood-Rah; Freakshow & the Bordello gang; Dr. Lady & the Usual Suspects; Bobby Gammonster & Boris the Buzzard; Arachna of the Spider People & Deadly; Mortimer Van Creep; and (making her Vortexx debut next Sunday) the one and only Misty Brew! Enjoy the shows and thanks for hanging out!

Vortexx-Molly the K-Memory HoleOUR NEWEST CHAT HOST
WELCOME ABOARD, MOLLY!

The staff of The Vortexx extends a warm welcome to our newest staff member and chat host -- MOLLY THE K! Molly has been a chat room regular since August 2015, and her witty comments have made her a frequent winner of "chat quote of the night." Molly is also a cracker-jack DJ and host of Down The Memory Hole on Desert Rock Radio, which has become a favorite hangout spot for Vortexx viewers after our Friday night show. Starting this week, Molly will be keeping our chatters in line as host of our Saturday night show. Welcome aboard, Molly!

Vortexx-Santa Ice Cream Bunny-20160717_BoneJangler

Sunday (7/17) @ 9:00 P.M. (ET)
THE BONE JANGLER
presents
SANTA AND THE ICE CREAM BUNNY (1972)

We conclude our Worst of the Worst Week with the rock-bottom absolute "worst" of the bad movies selected by our viewers. Join us tonight as THE BONE JANGLER and co-hosts Nocturna and HARMony present SANTA AND THE ICE CREAM BUNNY (1972). This live-action feature begins with Santa (with a large sweat stain on his butt) and his sleigh stuck in the sand on a Florida beach, just days before Christmas Eve. After trying unsuccessfully to extricate the sleigh, kids from a nearby subdivision are afraid they won't get any gifts on Christmas. To boost their spirits, Santa decides to tells them a story. The setting then dissolves into a movie-within-the-movie -- Thumbelina (1970) starring Shay Gardner as a bouncy, bra-less, mini-skirted hippie chick who wanders through a tacky Florida amusement park imagining she is Thumbelina. When we aired this stinker in December 2014, we had to lock the chatroom doors to prevent our viewers from fleeing in droves. And poor Destroyah, who hosted the chat, still hasn't recovered from the experience despite more than eighteen months of intensive therapy. Watch it if you dare. You've been warned!

Vortexx-Boggy Creek-20160718_Lord Blood-Rah

Monday (7/18) @ 9:00 P.M. (ET)
LORD BLOOD-RAH'S NERVE WRACKIN' THEATRE
presents
THE LEGEND OF BOGGY CREEK (1973)

Tonight's movie is a docudrama about a Sasquatch-type creature that terrorized the small town of Fouke, Arkansas for several years. Many of the folks who claim to have experienced these events actually play themselves in the movie. The film's visual style has been cited as the inspiration for the look and pacing of The Blair Witch Project. This one is definitely a "must see" for all Bigfoot fans, although Bigfoot himself (played by a guy in a gorilla suit) is somewhat of a disappointment. As always, Lord Blood-Rah will be spicing up the mix with some cool trailers, a cranial cavity search, and other extras.

Vortexx-Scream Bloody Murder-20160719_Bordello

Tuesday (7/19) @ 9:00 P.M. (ET)
BORDELLO OF HORROR
presents
SCREAM BLOODY MURDER (1973)

BORDELLO OF HORROR with Freakshow, Mistress Malicious, Sgt. Drizzlepuss, Ali Katt, and Mary Johuana presents SCREAM BLOODY MURDER (1973). A young man kills his father with a farm tractor, mangles his hand, gets sent to a mental hospital, goes even more nutzoid when he finds out his mother has remarried, and kills her and his stepfather. And that's only the first 20 minutes! Filmed in 1971, this was one of the earliest slasher films -- preceding Halloween and Friday the 13th by almost a decade. In addition to the movie, Freaky will be entertaining us with special musical guests Devil to Drag, a movie review by Mark Krawczyk from The Final Cut and more!

 

Vortexx-Drac vs Frank-20160720_Dr.LadyWednesday (7/20) @ 9:00 P.M. (ET)
THE LATE DR. LADY SHOW
presents
Al Adamson's DRACULA VS. FRANKENSTEIN (1971)

THE LATE DR. LADY SHOW with Dr. Lady and the Usual Suspects presents Al Adamson's DRACULA VS. FRANKENSTEIN (1971). This is the second of three films bearing that title released between 1970 and 1972 and arguably the best -- not because it's a good movie (which it isn't), but because it's consistently entertaining. Stockbroker-turned-actor Roger Engel (aka Zandor Vorkov) and accountant-turned-actor John Bloom play the title monsters, but the real stars are horror icons J. Carrol Naish and Lon Chaney, Jr. making their final screen appearances as a wheelchair-bound Dr. Frankenstein and his dim-witted assistant Groton. Angelo Rossito plays Grazbo the Evil Dwarf, the doctor's other henchman. Anthony Eisley plays an aging hippy who helps busty blonde Regina Carrol (Adamson's real-life wife) search for her sister (decapitated by Chaney at the beginning of the film). Forrest J Ackerman makes a cameo appearance as one of The Frankenstein Monster's victims.

Vortexx-Revenge Zombies-20160721_MonsterMovieNight

Thursday (7/21) @ 9:00 P.M. (ET)
MONSTER MOVIE NIGHT
presents
REVENGE OF THE ZOMBIES (1943)

MONSTER MOVIE NIGHT with Bobby Gammonster and Boris the Buzzard presents The Vortexx premiere of REVENGE OF THE ZOMBIES (1943). Since this movie was made in the midst of World War II, you might expect that there will be Nazis in it. And you won't be disappointed! Horror movie veteran John Carradine stars as Dr. Max Heinrich von Altermann, a mad scientist (is there any other kind?) working at an old mansion in the bayous of Louisiana. Mad Max has plans to create a race of living dead warriors for the Third Reich. But his plans are complicated by his deceased wife (Veda Ann Borg) -- a zombie who, in most unzombie-like fashion, has developed a mind of her own. Mantan Moreland reprises his role of Jeff from King of the Zombies (1941). Gale Storm (of My Little Margie fame), future Batman Robert Lowery, and cowboy actor Bob Steele co-star.

Vortexx-Bucket of Blood-20160722_Beware Theater

Friday (7/22) @ 9:00 P.M. (ET)
BEWARE THEATER
presents
BUCKET OF BLOOD (1959)

BEWARE THEATER with Arachna of the Spider People and her friend Deadly present another monochromatic marvel from the Golden Age of Black & White -- Roger Corman's BUCKET OF BLOOD (1959). In his only starring role, veteran character actor Dick Miller plays Walter Paisley, a coffeehouse busboy who gains recognition and respect as an artistic genius after he accidentally kills his cat and covers it with plaster. And now everyone's dying (literally!) to see his next creation. Corman regulars Bruno (Fat Dave) VeSota, Antony Carbone, and Barboura Morris add great support in this delightfully campy movie, while Julian Burton hams it up as the ultimate beat poet Maxwell H. Brock. Look for Bert Convey as the undercover narc who finds himself on the wrong end of Walter's frying pan.

Vortexx-Bride and Beast-20160723_Skunky

Saturday (7/23) @ 9:00 P.M. (ET)
SKUNKY CINEMA
presents The Vortexx premiere of
Ed Wood's THE BRIDE AND THE BEAST (1958)

SKUNKY CINEMA with Mortimer Van Creep presents The Vortexx premiere of Ed Wood's THE THE BRIDE AND THE BEAST (1958). This may be a Vortexx premiere, but since Ed wrote the screenplay for this stinker, you already have a pretty good idea of what you're in for. It's one of the strangest love triangles ever depicted on film involving a man, a woman, and a gorilla named Spanky. Charlotte Austin and Lance Fuller, both of whom are (inexplicably for a Wood film) decent actors, play newlywed couple Laura and Dan Fuller, whose marital bliss is spoiled when Laura develops an attraction for the gorilla that big game hunter Dan keeps caged in his basement. It turns out that Laura is harboring a dark secret which, in typical Wood fashion, is revealed in the first 15 minutes of the movie. The soundtrack is by Les Baxter, who scored many a film for American International Pictures during the 1960s and 1970s. And be sure to keep an eye out for the Angora sweater. Trust us, it's there!

Vortexx-Dark Garden-20160724_Misty Brew

Sunday (7/24) @ 9:00 P.M. (ET)
MISTY BREW'S CREATURE FEATURE
presents The Vortexx premiere of
DARK GARDEN (2004)

Join us tonight as we welcome MISTY BREW'S CREATURE FEATURE to The Vortexx! A true legend among horror hosts and a 2015 inductee into the Horror Host Hall of Fame, Misty has been entertaining viewers on various Fox TV affiliates and more recently on her own YouTube channel since 1983. And now you can also watch her in The Vortexx! Tonight Misty will be hosting the Vortexx premiere of DARK GARDEN (2004), a cool indie film by Patrick Bond. It's a psychological thriller about a downtrodden man named Warren (Kyle Van Pool), who finds himself having to choose between good and evil when he moves into a new house and befriends Harry (J.W. McCrary), who soon recruits Warren to assist him in his wicked ways. In addition to the movie, Misty will be entertaining us with a special interview with Mr. McCrary and previews of Misty's Coming Attractions. Don't miss it!

✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿

Welcome to The Vortexx where it's ALL HOSTS ALL THE TIME!

The Vortexx - Keep Calm"Every day is a good day that ends in The Vortexx." You can find us at horrorhost.net and livestream.com/allhorrorhosts. Remember folks, we're the Gooble Gobble Channel. We accept everyone. And we will keep the doors open as long as you keep coming around! If you're a horror host looking for an additional outlet for your show, email Sluggo at sluggo@horrorhost.net.

The Vortexx - Bloody Pit of Health Fitness Centers

If you don't get the results you're looking for within the eight weeks of the program, The Azure Executioner guarantees that he will personally throw you into his exclusive vat of acid!
Introducing our newest sponsor -- Bloody Pit of Health! Want to eliminate those things that interfere with the harmony of your perfect body? The Bloody Pit has all the latest fitness equipment -- weight room, Olympic-sized pool, and even a spider room. To find the location nearest you, visit their website www.clubdesade.com

The Vortexx - Mummy Fart

Available in three convenient sizes!
Mummy Fart! The perfect product to get those pleasant smells out of your tomb. Available in three convenient sizes!

The Vortexx - Kurt Pasakivi's Used Car Emporium

If you're interested, just e-mail us for Kurt's current location.
Kurt Pasakivi's Used Car Emporium! At Kurt's Emporium you can buy the car of your dreams for a deep discount. If you see a car on the street that you like, just send Kurt a photo of the car and the license plate, and he'll negotiate with the owner and sell it to you at a steal!

The Vortexx - Executioner's Ale

The Official Beers of The Vortexx!
Executioner's Ale! A bloody good red ale crafted in the torture chamber of the Crimson Executioner. Sock Stout! The sock with the hops. A thick and creamy head just for you. [Sock Stout is a trademark of Raen, used with permission.]

The Vortexx - Amazon Andy

Amazon Andy is the creation of Nick Polotta, a very gifted writer and comedian who, sadly, passed away on April 13, 2013.

Totino's Pizza Rolls, Crimson Royal Jelly, and Amazon Andy's Southern Fried Tarantula Legs! The original sponsors of The Vortexx!

The Vortexx Skull Cornbread

The Official Food of The Vortexx!
Skull Cornbread! The official food of The Vortexx, served piping hot from the oven of the Crimson Executioner.

The Vortexx - Chia Host

BORDELLO OF HORROR with Freakshow airs Tuesday at 9 (ET)

Chia Host! The latest sensation from Mushnick Florists. You can see him every Tuesday night in The Vortexx!

The Vortexx - Chilly Dilly

Two delicious pickle treats!

Chilly Dilly! A delicious pickle treat that's spiced just right for every bite. And now you can "pucker up" with the all-new Chilly Dilly Lip Balm!

The Vortexx - Egg Bleach

Jason "Egg" Brown was an integral part of The Vortexx as a staff member and long-time viewer until his passing on June 27, 2016. Jason may have departed this Earth, but he will live forever in The Vortexx.

"Now that's a product I can really GET BEHIND!" -- Egg.

Egg Bleach! The all-purpose antiseptic for treatment of cuts, scratches, and abrasions. And now you can touch up those "intimate" parts of your body with the all-new Egg Anal Bleach!

The Vortexx - President Sluggo

SLUGGO!!! OUR DEAR LEADER AND FREELY ELECTED PRESIDENT OF THE VORTEXX!!!

Posted by Alan Smithee in HOSTED HORROR, 0 comments
The Vortexx – Hosted Horror: Schedule for 3 July 2016 – 10 July 2016

The Vortexx – Hosted Horror: Schedule for 3 July 2016 – 10 July 2016

VORTEXX SCHEDULE FOR
JULY 03 - 10, 2016

By The Crimson Executioner
&
Woofer McWooferson

The Vortexx Hosts

Welcome to THE VORTEXXwhere it's ALL HOSTS ALL THE TIME!

Welcome to THE VORTEXX where it's ALL HOSTS ALL THE TIME! We've got a great line-up of hosts, shows, and movies for your viewing and chatting pleasure, including one terrific Indie returning to The Vortexx for "INDEPENDENTS" DAY on Monday as well as several additional returning favorites. Our hosts are Arachna of the Spider People & Deadly, Dr. Sigmund Zoid, Freakshow & the Bordello gang, Dr. Lady & the Usual Suspects, Bobby Gammonster & Boris The Buzzard, Riggor Mortiss & Nyte Angel, Lord Blood-Rah, and Gorenard the Beerbarian. Check out the schedule for details about all the fine shows airing this week in The Vortexx. Enjoy the shows and thanks for hanging out!

Vortexx-Beware Theater-20160703

BEWARE THEATER presents THE KILLER SHREWS (1959)

Sunday (7/3) @ 9:00 P.M. (ET)
BEWARE THEATER
presents
THE KILLER SHREWS (1959)

BEWARE THEATER with Arachna of the Spider People and her friend Deadly presents another gem from the Golden Age of Black & White -- THE KILLER SHREWS (1959). On an isolated island, a small group of people are terrorized by giant voracious shrews in the midst of a hurricane. Who cares if the shrews are really just dogs with rugs attached to them? This is a highly entertaining movie! The all-star cast includes James (Rosco P. Coltraine ) Best, Ken (Festus) Curtis, and Ingrid (Miss Sweden 1956 ) Goude.

Vortexx-Puppet-20160704_Doctor Sigmund Zoid

ALTERNATIVE REALITIES presents PUPPET MONSTER MASSACRE (2010)

Monday (7/4) @ 9:00 P.M. (ET)
ALTERNATIVE REALITIES
presents a Vortexx indie favorite
Dustin Wayde Mills' PUPPET MONSTER MASSACRE (2010)

Join us tonight for our "Independents" Day Celebration as ALTERNATIVE REALITIES with Dr. Sigmund Zoid presents a Vortexx indie favorite -- Dustin Wayde Mills' PUPPET MONSTER MASSACRE (2010). A group of teens are challenged to spend a night in the Wagner mansion on the edge of town. Little do they know that the owner, Dr. Wolfgang Wagner, has concocted a monstrosity in the basement and plans to make the hapless teens the creature's first big meal. The actors in this movie are all puppets, so if you've ever wondered what boobs would look like on Sesame Street, then this is definitely the movie for you.

Vortexx-Messiah-20160705_Bordello

BORDELLO OF HORROR presents MESSIAH OF EVIL (1973)

Tuesday (7/5) @ 9:00 P.M. (ET)
BORDELLO OF HORROR
presents
MESSIAH OF EVIL (1973)

BORDELLO OF HORROR with Freakshow, Mistress Malicious, Sgt. Drizzlepuss, Ali Katt, and Mary Johuana presents MESSIAH OF EVIL (1973). It's about a woman looking for her missing artist father who discovers a zombie cult that is wiping out a Californian seaside town. The film was written by Willard Huyck and Gloria Katz, who received an Oscar nomination a year later for writing American Graffiti. In addition to the movie, Freaky will be entertaining us with special musical guests Monster Mob, a movie review by Mark Krawczyk from The Final Cut, and more!

Vortexx-Blood Coffin-20160706_Dr Lady

THE LATE DR. LADY SHOW presents DR. BLOOD'S COFFIN (1961)

Wednesday (7/6) @ 9:00 P.M. (ET)
THE LATE DR. LADY SHOW
presents
DR. BLOOD'S COFFIN (1961)

Dr. Lady and the Usual Suspects present DR. BLOOD'S COFFIN (1961). Kieron Moore chain smokes his way through this creepy British thriller as Dr. Peter Blood, who plans to kill "worthless" people and use their hearts to revive "worthy" corpses. The beautiful Hazel Court co-stars as the nurse whose late husband becomes a candidate for the doctor's experiments. Hey, Dr. Blood, if you didn't smoke so much, maybe you wouldn't be "coffin."

Vortexx-Gamera-20160707_Bobby G

MONSTER MOVIE NIGHT presents GAMMERA THE INVINCIBLE (1965)

Thursday (7/7) @ 9:00 P.M. (ET)
MONSTER MOVIE NIGHT
presents
GAMMERA THE INVINCIBLE (1965)

Bobby Gammonster and Boris the Buzzard presents everyone's favorite giant flying turtle GAMMERA THE INVINCIBLE (1965). An atomic explosion awakens our giant, fire-breathing title monster from his millions of years of hibernation. Will anyone be able to stop him before he turns all of Tokyo into turtle soup? Starring Brian (Quatermass) Donlevy, Albert (Dr. Cyclops) Dekker, and a whole bunch of Japanese actors you've probably never heard of, this is the very first movie in the popular Gamera series. And, yes, it is spelled Gammera in the original American release.

Vortexx-Mask of Satan-20160708_Riggor

RIGGOR MORTISS PRESENTS THE MASK OF SATAN (1960)

Friday (7/8) @ 9:00 P.M. (ET)
RIGGOR MORTISS
presents
Mario Bava's THE MASK OF SATAN (1960)

Riggor and co-host Nyte Angel returns to The Vortexx to present Mario Bava's THE MASK OF SATAN (1960). Scream queen Barbara Steele plays a dual role as a vengeful witch who returns from the grave and the beautiful descendant whose body she wants to possess. This film was originally released in the U.S. as Black Sundaywith some of the gorier parts cut out and a new score by Les Baxter. The version we're showing tonight is the English-language version of the original film (with all the gory scenes left in) and with the original Italian score by Roberto Nicolosi.

Vortexx-Magic Sword-20160709_Lord Blood-Rah

LORD BLOOD-RAH'S NERVE WRACKIN' THEATRE presents THE MAGIC SWORD (1962)

Saturday (7/9) @ 9:00 P.M. (ET)
LORD BLOOD-RAH'S
NERVE WRACKIN' THEATRE
presents
THE MAGIC SWORD (1962)

This delightful sword-and-sorcery fantasy from Bert I. Gordon (Mr. B.I.G.) stars Basil Rathbone as the turban-wearing evil sorcerer Lodac, who kidnaps the beautiful Princess Helene (Ann Helm) and develops seven challenges for her would-be rescuer Sir George (Gary Lockwood). The stellar supporting cast includes Maila (Vampira) Nurmi as a hag, Richard (Jaws) Kiel as a giant pinhead, Estelle Winwood as the bumbling good witch Sybil, and veteran B-movie little guy Angelo Rossito as (surprise! surprise!) a dwarf. As always, Lord Blood-Rah will be spicing up the mix with some cool trailers, a Cranial Cavity Search, and other extras.

Vortexx-Lady Frankenstein-20160710_Gorenard

THE GOLDEN HORDE presents LADY FRANKENSTEIN (1971)

Sunday (7/10) @ 9:00 P.M. (ET)
THE GOLDEN HORDE
presents
LADY FRANKENSTEIN (1971)

THE GOLDEN HORDE with that manliest of manly-men hosts Gorenard the Beerbarian presents LADY FRANKENSTEIN (1971). It's a heart-warming, gut-churning story about a daughter's love for her dad. The daughter is Tania Frankenstein (Rosalba Neri aka Sara Bay), who takes up where dear old dad (Joseph Cotten) left off, after he is killed by his stripey-pants creation. It's two monsters for the price of one, as the doctor's horny daughter creates a handsome new creature for her sexual pleasure and then screws him on the operating table while the Universal mob storms the castle. Co-starring Mickey (Crimson Executioner) Hargitay and directed by Mel (Gravis Mushnik) Welles.

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The Vortexx cubeWelcome to The Vortexx where it's ALL HOSTS ALL THE TIME!
"Every day is a good day that ends in The Vortexx." You can find us at horrorhost.net and livestream.com/allhorrorhosts. Remember folks, we're the Gooble Gobble Channel. We accept everyone. And we will keep the doors open as long as you keep coming around! If you're a horror host looking for an additional outlet for your show, email Sluggo at sluggo@horrorhost.net.

 

The Vortexx - Bloody Pit of Health Fitness Centers

If you don't get the results you're looking for within the eight weeks of the program, The Azure Executioner guarantees that he will personally throw you into his exclusive vat of acid!

Introducing our newest sponsor -- Bloody Pit of Health! Want to eliminate those things that interfere with the harmony of your perfect body? The Bloody Pit has all the latest fitness equipment -- weight room, Olympic-sized pool, and even a spider room. To find the location nearest you, visit their website www.clubdesade.com

The Vortexx - Mummy Fart

Available in three convenient sizes!
Mummy Fart! The perfect product to get those pleasant smells out of your tomb. Available in three convenient sizes!

 

The Vortexx - Kurt Pasakivi's Used Car Emporium

Kurt will sell you a car at a steal!

If you're interested, just e-mail us for Kurt's current location.
Kurt Pasakivi's Used Car Emporium! At Kurt's Emporium you can buy the car of your dreams for a deep discount. If you see a car on the street that you like, just send Kurt a photo of the car and the license plate, and he'll negotiate with the owner and sell it to you at a steal!

The Vortexx - Executioner's Ale

The Official Beers of The Vortexx!

Executioner's Ale! A bloody good red ale crafted in the torture chamber of the Crimson Executioner. Sock Stout! The sock with the hops. A thick and creamy head just for you. [Sock Stout is a trademark of Raen, used with permission.]

 

The Vortexx - Amazon Andy

Amazon Andy is the creation of Nick Polotta, a very gifted writer and comedian who, sadly, passed away on April 13, 2013.

Totino's Pizza Rolls, Crimson Royal Jelly, and Amazon Andy's Southern Fried Tarantula Legs! The original sponsors of The Vortexx!

 

Vortexx - Skull cornbread

The Official Food of The Vortexx!

Skull Cornbread! The official food of The Vortexx, served piping hot from the oven of the Crimson Executioner.

 

 

 

The Vortexx - Chia Host

BORDELLO OF HORROR with Freakshow airs Tuesday at 9 (ET)

Chia Host! The latest sensation from Mushnick Florists. You can see him every Tuesday night in The Vortexx!

 

The Vortexx - Chilly Dilly

Two delicious pickle treats!

Chilly Dilly! A delicious pickle treat that's spiced just right for every bite. And now you can "pucker up" with the all-new Chilly Dilly Lip Balm!

 

The Vortexx - Egg Bleach

Jason "Egg" Brown was an integral part of The Vortexx as a staff member and long-time viewer until his passing on June 27, 2016. Jason may have departed this Earth, but he will live forever in The Vortexx.

"Now that's a product I can really GET BEHIND!" -- Egg.

Egg Bleach! The all-purpose antiseptic for treatment of cuts, scratches, and abrasions. And now you can touch up those "intimate" parts of your body with the all-new Egg Anal Bleach!

 

Vortexx - Slugnado

Posted by Alan Smithee in HOSTED HORROR, 0 comments

The Vortexx – Hosted Horror: Schedule for 19 June – 26 June 2016

VORTEXX SCHEDULE FOR
JUNE 19 - JUNE 26, 2016

By The Crimson Executioner
&
Woofer McWooferson

The Vortexx Hosts

Welcome to THE VORTEXX where it's ALL HOSTS ALL THE TIME!

Welcome to THE VORTEXX where it's ALL HOSTS ALL THE TIME! We've got another great line-up of hosts, shows, and movies for your viewing and chatting pleasure this week with several Vortexx favorites and a field trip to the Peninsula of Horror on Saturday. Our hosts are Arachna of the Spider People & Deadly, Mr. Lobo, Freakshow & the Bordello gang, Dr. Lady & the Usual Suspects, Ghosts on the Big Brown Couch, Lord Blood-Rah, The Bone Jangler & Coven girls Nocturna and Penny Layne, and (at the Peninsula of Horror) Professor Gillman, Freezer Mortis & Oliver. Check out the schedule for details about all the fine shows airing this week in The Vortexx. Enjoy the shows and thanks for hanging out!

20160619_The Vortexx - Beware Theater

Sunday (6/19) @ 9:00 P.M. (ET)
BEWARE THEATER
presents
THE BRAIN THAT WOULDN'T DIE (1962)

BEWARE THEATER with Arachna of the Spider People and her friend Deadly present another cinematic gem from the Golden Age of Black and White (and a Vortexx favorite) -- THE BRAIN THAT WOULDN'T DIE (1962). Affectionately known to its many fans as "The Brain That Wouldn't Shuddup" and "Jan in the Pan," this film has everything that a B-movie fan could possibly ask for -- mutants, mad doctors, talking heads, cat fighting strippers, and some of the sleaziest, most infectious music you've ever heard. [Artwork courtesy of Arachna of the Spider People.]

Vortexx-Lobo-Plan 9-20160620

Monday (6/20) @ 9:00 P.M. (ET)
CINEMA INSOMNIA WITH MR. LOBO
presents Ed Wood's
PLAN 9 FROM OUTER SPACE (1959)

CINEMA INSOMNIA WITH MR. LOBO returns to The Vortexx with Ed Wood's PLAN 9 FROM OUTER SPACE (1959). A couple of pompous aliens in silk pajamas (Dudley Manlove and Joanna Lee) and their leader The Ruler (Bunny Breckinridge) plan to resurrect Bela Lugosi, Vampira, and Tor Johnson as slow moving zombies. Why? Because all you of Earth are Idiots! Bela died shortly before shooting began, so Ed used some footage he had of Bela, wrote a script around it, and persuaded his wife's chiropractor (Tom Mason) to shoot the rest of the scenes with a cape hiding his face. Did he really think no one would notice? We're sure Mr. Lobo is going to have a lot of fun with this one!

Vortexx-Freakshow-Rattlers-20160621

Tuesday (6/21). 9:00 P.M. (ET)
BORDELLO OF HORROR
presents
RATTLERS (1976)

BORDELLO OF HORROR with Freakshow, Mistress Malicious, Sgt. Drizzlepuss, and Ali Katt presents RATTLERS (1976). When two young boys are savagely attacked and killed by a legion of rattlesnakes in a small California desert town, the local sheriff (Tony Ballen) calls upon herpetologist Dr. Tom Parkinson (Sam Chew) to discover why the snakes are displaying abnormal aggression. Their investigation leads them to a nearby army base, where the commanding officer, Colonel Stroud (Dan Priest), seems strangely reluctant to help them. In addition to the movie, Freaky will be entertaining us with special musical guests John Masino Band - JMB and more!

Vortexx-Dr Lady-Black Sabbath-20160622

Wednesday (6/22). 9:00 P.M. (ET)
THE LATE DR. LADY SHOW
presents Mario Bava's
BLACK SABBATH (1964)

THE LATE DR. LADY SHOW with Dr. Lady and the Usual Suspects presents Mario Bava's BLACK SABBATH (1964). This excellent trilogy of terror is hosted by Boris Karloff, who also stars in the third (and arguably best) episode -- "The Wurdalak." Based on a story by Tolstoy, it's about a family in nineteenth-century Russia who are plagued by a particularly vicious line of vampires. Boris sets out to destroy them, only to become one himself. The other two episodes are about a nurse who steals a diamond ring from the hand of a dead clairvoyant (with somewhat predictable results) and a hooker who receives threatening calls from a dead man she betrayed. Originally released as I tre volti della paura (Three Faces of Fear), this movie was Boris's only screen appearance as a vampire, so don't miss it! [Movie poster courtesy of Doktor Sick.]

Vortexx-Ghosts Brown Couch-Naked Witch-20160623

Thursday (6/23) @ 9:00 P.M. (ET)
GHOSTS ON THE BIG BROWN COUCH
present Larry Buchanan's
THE NAKED WITCH (1961)

GHOSTS ON THE BIG BROWN COUCH return to The Vortexx as our three lovely ghosts (Dori, Becky, and Babs) along with Johnny (the guy who moved into their apartment) present Larry Buchanan's THE NAKED WITCH (1961). A witch (who happens to be both beautiful and naked) is brought back from the grave and embarks on a campaign of revenge against the descendants of the folks who were responsible for her death. This is the film that helped launch Buchanan's career -- which, by the way, is NOT a good thing.

Vortexx-Lord Blood-Rah-Dead Men Walk-20160624

Friday (6/24) @ 9:00 P.M. (ET)
LORD BLOOD-RAH'S NERVE WRACKIN' THEATRE
presents
DEAD MEN WALK (1943)

George Zucco has a dual role as a Satan worshipper who returns from the grave to menace his twin brother, a kindly small-town physician. Dwight (Renfield) Frye plays bad-guy Zucco's hunchback henchman. It's fun to watch Zucco, who plays a villain in most movies, working both sides of the street. And you can depend on Lord Blood-Rah to spice up the mix with some cool trailers and a Cranial Cavity Search.

Vortexx-Peninsula 01-20160625

Saturday (6/25) @ 8:00 P.M. (ET)
THE PENINSULA OF HORROR
-- the showcase for Florida's finest horror hosts --
presents
A CASE OF MURDER CHAT NIGHT!

First up at 8 (ET) FORMERLY CRAPPICS with Freezer Mortis presents THE TICKET OF LEAVE MAN (1937). An ex-convict on parole ("ticket of leave") who is falsely accused of a series of murders must prove his innocence by catching the real murderer -- a crazed serial killer known as The Tiger (the aptly named Tod Slaughter). Along with the movie, there will be expert analysis and "color commentary" by our favorite serial killer and neighborhood psychopath -- Oliver from OLIVER'S TWISTED BARGAIN BASEMENT MIDNIGHT MOVIE STONER FRIENDLY FREAK SHOW. Then stick around at approximately 10 (ET) as THE PROFESSOR GILLMAN SHOW presents THE BLOODY BROOD (1959). Peter (Columbo) Falk chews the scenery as Nico, the psychotic leader of a drug-dealing gang of beatniks, while Prof. Gillman chews even more scenery as Lt. Gillumbo of the Lagoon Angeles Police Dept. in one of our all-time favorite Professor Gillman episodes. There will be a Pre-Fourth of July “Strike Up The Band” PreShow for The Early Boids at 7 (ET), and Professor Gillman will be broadcasting LIVE from Lagoon House between the shows.

Vortexx-Peninsula 02-20160625

PLEASE NOTE: Tonight's feature will be aired on The Peninsula of Horror's Livestream channel -- livestream.com/tpoh. Viewers who show up on The Vortexx channel Saturday night will be re-directed there, so you can save yourself a couple of steps by going directly to The Peninsula of
Horror
.

Vortexx-Bone Jangler-Devil's Hand-20160626

Sunday (6/26) @ 9:00 P.M. (ET)
THE BONE JANGLER
presents
THE DEVIL'S HAND (1962)

THE BONE JANGLER with co-hosts Nocturna and Penny Layne presents THE DEVIL'S HAND (1962). Tonight's movie is about a group of cultists led by Commissioner Gordon of the Batman TV series (Neil Hamilton) who worship a Devil God named Camba. The cultists spend most of their time chanting and dancing to exotic sounding flute and drum beats, but their leader also has a nifty sacrifice machine consisting of a wheel with sharp swords. Of course, the real fun of tonight's show is not the movie itself but the clever host bits, as well as the numerous sound inserts and nostalgic commercials that TBJ throws into the mix. This was Penny's second appearance on the show, shot a month after her famous "ladder" scene in the TBJ Christmas special.

✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿

The Vortexx Eyeballs

"Every day is a good day that ends in the Vortexx." You can find us at horrorhost.net and livestream.com/allhorrorhosts. Remember folks, we're the Gooble Gobble Channel. We accept everyone. And we will keep the doors open as long as you keep coming around! If you're a horror host looking for an additional outlet for your show, email Sluggo at sluggo@horrorhost.net

The Vortexx - Bloody Pit of Health Fitness Centers

If you don't get the results you're looking for within the eight weeks of the program, The Azure Executioner guarantees that he will personally throw you into his exclusive vat of acid!
Introducing our newest sponsor -- Bloody Pit of Health! Want to eliminate those things that interfere with the harmony of your perfect body? The Bloody Pit has all the latest fitness equipment -- weight room, Olympic-sized pool, and even a spider room. To find the location nearest you, visit their website www.clubdesade.com

The Vortexx - Mummy Fart

Available in three convenient sizes!
Mummy Fart! The perfect product to get those pleasant smells out of your tomb. Available in three convenient sizes!

The Vortexx - Kurt Pasakivi's Used Car Emporium

If you're interested, just e-mail us for Kurt's current location.
Kurt Pasakivi's Used Car Emporium! At Kurt's Emporium you can buy the car of your dreams for a deep discount. If you see a car on the street that you like, just send Kurt a photo of the car and the license plate, and he'll negotiate with the owner and sell it to you at a steal!

The Vortexx - Executioner's Ale

The Official Beers of The Vortexx!
Executioner's Ale! A bloody good red ale crafted in the torture chamber of the Crimson Executioner. Sock Stout! The sock with the hops. A thick and creamy head just for you. [Sock Stout is a trademark of Raen, used with permission.]

The Vortexx - Amazon Andy

Amazon Andy is the creation of Nick Polotta, a very gifted writer and comedian who, sadly, passed away on April 13, 2013.

Totino's Pizza Rolls, Crimson Royal Jelly, and Amazon Andy's Southern Fried Tarantula Legs! The original sponsors of the Vortexx!

The Vortexx Skull Cornbread

The Official Food of The Vortexx!
Skull Cornbread! The official food of The Vortexx, served piping hot from the oven of the Crimson Executioner.

The Vortexx - Chia Host

BORDELLO OF HORROR with Freakshow airs Tuesday at 9 (ET)

Chia Host! The latest sensation from Mushnick Florists. You can see him every Tuesday night in The Vortexx!

The Vortexx - Chilly Dilly

Two delicious pickle treats!

Chilly Dilly! A delicious pickle treat that's spiced just right for every bite. And now you can "pucker up" with the all-new Chilly Dilly Lip Balm!

The Vortexx - Egg Bleach

"Now that's a product I can really GET BEHIND!" -- Egg.

Egg Bleach! The all-purpose antiseptic for treatment of cuts, scratches, and abrasions. And now you can touch up those "intimate" parts of your body with the all-new Egg Anal Bleach!

The Vortexx - President Sluggo

SLUGGO!!! OUR DEAR LEADER AND FREELY ELECTED PRESIDENT OF THE VORTEXX!!!

Posted by Alan Smithee in HOSTED HORROR, 0 comments
The Vortexx: Schedule for June 6 – 12, 2016

The Vortexx: Schedule for June 6 – 12, 2016

Welcome to The Vortexx - A Special Friend of House of Tortured Souls

By Woofer McWooferson

The Vortexx 5 years header

House of Tortured Souls would like to welcome The Vortexx as a friend of the House. Please give a warm welcome to those crazy horror hosts at The Vortexx and check out their shows this week.

The Vortexx Hosts

Welcome to THE VORTEXX where it's ALL HOSTS ALL THE TIME! We've got another great line-up of hosts, shows, and movies for your viewing and chatting pleasure this week, with two movies making their Vortexx debut along with some cool indie films and several returning favorites. Our hosts are Doctor Mortose, Freakshow & the Bordello gang, Edgar von Ghoul, The Reaper, Dr. Lady & the Usual Suspects, Rizzle MaNizzle the Clown, Lord Blood-Rah, and Bobby Gammonster & Boris the Buzzard. Please note that during the month of June, we will be adding a Sunday show to our weekly line-up, so there will be a featured movie and moderated chat every night of the week. Enjoy the shows and thanks for hanging out!

20150606-12_The Vortexx - Doctor Mortose

DOCTOR MORTOSE COMMANDS
presents
SCARED TO DEATH (1980)

Monday (6/6). 9:00 P.M. (ET). DOCTOR MORTOSE COMMANDS presents The Vortexx premiere of SCARED TO DEATH (1980). No, folks, this is not the Bela Lugosi movie from the 1940s that we've aired a few times before. This film by Bill Malone, who was the chief designer at the Don Post mask studios, is about a genetic experiment gone horribly wrong. The result is an Alien-like creature with an appetite for spinal fluid called Syngenor (Synthesized Genetic Organism).

20150606-12_The Vortexx - Bordello of Horror

BORDELLO OF HORROR
presents
MONSTER OF GOLDEN GATE (2013)

Tuesday (6/7). 9:00 P.M. (ET). BORDELLO OF HORROR with Freakshow, Mistress Malicious, Sgt. Drizzlepuss, and Ali Katt presents MONSTER OF GOLDEN GATE (2013). This throwback to those awesome black-and-white cheesy monster movies of the ‘50s and ‘60s was directed by Renya Young better known to horror fans as Miss Misery, the host of Movie Massacre. Freaky will kick off the show with two short indie horror films -- Hi Neighbor directed by Chad Halvorsen and Frigid Night directed by Robby McBride. There will also be interviews from the Milwaukee Twisted Dreams Film Festival with Christopher Kai House, Michael Viers, Alice Wilson, Hart Fisher, James Bett Jr and Kevin Jamison, as well as musical guests Kitty in a Casket.

20150606-12_The Vortexx - Your Final Answer & Midnight Chillers

WEDNESDAY DOUBLE FEATURE:
YOUR FINAL ANSWER and MIDNIGHT CHILLERS
present
GURU: THE MAD MONK (1971)

Wednesday (6/8). 9:00 P.M. (ET). Join us tonight for a WEDNESDAY DOUBLE FEATURE! We kick off the evening with a generous serving of YOUR FINAL ANSWER -- a weekly comedy series (2-3 minutes per episode) hosted by The Reaper who answers Q&As from his viewers. He's bumbling, idiotic, has a habit of never getting around to an answer -- and is absolutely hilarious. Next up is MIDNIGHT CHILLERS with Edgar von Ghoul, who will be presenting The Vortexx premiere of Andy Milligan's GURU: THE MAD MONK (1971). It's about a deranged chaplain at a 15th-century prison colony, who's got a vampire mistress and a one-eyed hunchback servant named (of course) Igor. Edgar's special guest tonight is former disc jockey Ray Green, whose main claim to fame is being one of the first to interview Elvis Presley (on his radio show in May 1956) -- and the first to record an Elvis concert in its entirety.

20150606-12_The Vortexx - Late Dr. Lady

THE LATE DR LADY SHOW
presents
CHILDREN SHOULDN'T PLAY WITH DEAD THINGS (1972)

Thursday (6/9). 9:00 P.M. (ET). THE LATE DR LADY SHOW with Dr. Lady and the Usual Suspects presents a Vortexx favorite -- CHILDREN SHOULDN'T PLAY WITH DEAD THINGS (1972). Although dismissed at the time of its release as just "another zombie movie," this film has since been recognized as being years ahead of its time in its frank depiction of same-sex undead marriage. It's about a group of friends who go to an island to act out a satanic rite involving a corpse they name Orville. Needless to say, it all goes horribly awry. Director Bob Clark would go on to bigger and better things with Porky's and A Christmas Story.

20150606-12_The Vortexx - Rizzle MaNizzle
RIZZLE'S FUNHOUSE OF LUNACY DOUBLE FEATURE!
GLEN OR GLENDA? (1953)
and
BLOODY PIT OF HORROR (1965)

Friday (6/10). 9:00 P.M. (ET). Join us tonight for a RIZZLE'S FUNHOUSE OF LUNACY DOUBLE FEATURE! First up is Ed Wood's GLEN OR GLENDA (1953) starring Ed himself as Glen, a tortured soul who is afraid to tell his wife (real-life girlfriend Dolores Fuller) that he enjoys putting on Angora sweaters and going out at night as Glenda. Bela Lugosi is also on hand, sitting in an easy chair in a room full of skulls, shrunken heads, and voodoo dolls, and uttering non sequiturs such as "pull ze string!" Then be sure stick around as Rizzle and co-hosts Midnight Murray and The Crimson Executioner present BLOODY PIT OF HORROR (1965) like you've never seen it before. There will be plenty of voiceovers, cartoons, accordion music and other audio goodies, and CE will be trying his hand as Uncle Crimmie, host of a children's show at the Crazy Castle of Lunacy, and as an anchor man on Crimson Action News. We guarantee you'll all be scratching your heads in total amazement! [CE artwork courtesy of Doc Mortose.]

20150606-12_The Vortexx - Lord Blood-Rah

LORD BLOOD-RAH'S NERVE WRACKIN' THEATRE
presents
TRACK OF THE MOON BEAST (1976)

Saturday (6/11). 9:00 P.M. (ET). LORD BLOOD-RAH'S NERVE WRACKIN' THEATRE presents TRACK OF THE MOON BEAST (1976). After a beefy young mineralogist (Chase Cordell) gets boinked in the head by a meteor fragment, he is transformed into a hideous lizard-like monster whenever the moon comes out. Badly paced and badly shot, with a badly constructed story and a mostly talentless cast playing cardboard characters, its one saving feature is that soon-to-be-famous Rick Baker designed the beast. As always, Lord Blood-Rah will be spicing up the mix with some cool trailers and a Cranial Cavity Search.

20150606-12_The Vortexx - Bobby Gammonster

MONSTER MOVIE NIGHT
presents
EMBRYO (1976)

Sunday (6/12). MONSTER MOVIE NIGHT with Bobby Gammonster and Boris The Buzzard presents EMBRYO (1976). You don't have a lot of opportunities to see Rock Hudson in The Vortexx, let alone Rock Hudson playing a mad scientist, so come on by tonight and enjoy! In tonight's movie Doc Rock figures out a way to grow a fetus into adulthood within a matter of weeks, and, of course, things soon go horribly wrong. Sultry Barbara Carrera co-stars, with guest appearances by Roddy McDowall and Dr. Joyce Brothers.

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Posted by Alan Smithee in HOSTED HORROR, 0 comments