The Vortexx-6 years_Featured_1200x630


04 – 11 SEPTEMBER 2016

By The Crimson Executioner
Woofer McWooferson

The Vortexx Hosts_02


Welcome to The Vortexx where it's now been ALL HOSTS ALL THE TIME FOR SIX YEARS! On Labor Day Weekend 2010 we became the first Livestream channel to broadcast hosted B-movies 24/7, and this week we're celebrating our six-year anniversary with another great line-up of shows, hosts, and movies including FOUR movies and ONE great new host making their Vortexx debut. And be sure to come by on Saturday for our HorrorHound Weekend live show! Our hosts this week are Misty Brew, Freakshow & the Bordello gang, Remo D. & friends, Mortimer Van Creep, Dave Binkley & Shannon Steele, Arachna of the Spider People & Deadly, and (making his Vortexx debut on Monday) Vincent Grimmly. Check out the schedule for details about all the fine shows airing this week in The Vortexx. Enjoy the shows and thanks for hanging out!

Vortexx-Dark Road-20160904_Misty Brew

Sunday (8/21) @ 9:00 P.M. (ET)
The Vortexx premiere of
DARK ROAD (2009)

MISTY BREW'S CREATURE FEATURE presents The Vortexx premiere of DARK ROAD aka The Devil Comes Home to Missouri. On a foggy night in the small southern town of Whitewater, Missouri, a local sheriff is called to the roadside scene of a violent execution-style murder. When the victim is identified as a mob-connected thug with local ties, the sheriff must determine if the murder is a message -- either to him or for him. However, the gathering storm of violence heading his way will leave no time for second guessing. This Indie movie by Patrick Bond and Steve E. Turner was filmed entirely in and around Cape Girardeau, Missouri (Misty's home base) and features local talent including members of The Tone Def Allstars (Darren Burgfeld) and Drivin Rain (Skully Shemwell) in lead roles.

Vortexx-Screaming Skull-20160905_Night Chills Theater

Monday (9/05) @ 9:00 P.M. (ET)

Tonight we celebrate Labor Day (and the 469th birthday of The Crimson Executioner) by welcoming NIGHT CHILLS THEATRE with Vincent Grimmly to The Vortexx! Hailing from The City of Sin, the hilarious and talented Mr. Grimmly follows in the rich tradition of Las Vegas vampire horror hosts, keeping us entertained with his collection of nutty schlock flicks that he broadcasts from his studio at Castle Pappdeckel. Vincent is assisted by his sidekick and co-host -- a pet raven named Phydeaux (pronounced "Fido"), who unfortunately clams up on camera during his debut appearance. Tonight Vincent and Phydeaux will be presenting THE SCREAMING SKULL (1958). It's about a newlywed couple whose marital bliss is spoiled by the ghost of the husband's previous wife. The producers of this movie offered free burial services to anyone who died of fright while watching the film, so we're gonna make the same offer. Join us tonight . . . if you dare!

Vortexx-Werewolf v Vampire Woman-20160906_Bordello

Tuesday (9/6) @ 9:00 P.M. (ET)

Tonight Freakshow, Mistress Malicious, Sgt. Drizzlepuss, Ali Katt, and Mary Johuana presents WEREWOLF VERSUS THE VAMPIRE WOMAN (1970) starring Paul Naschy as Waldemar Daninsky the Werewolf and Patty Shepard as Countess Wandessa the Vampire Woman. Just imagine what would happen if a group of twelve-year-olds decided to make their own version of the old Universal monster movies. If you can picture that, then you have a pretty good idea of what this movie is all about. In addition to the movie, Freaky will be entertaining us with special musical guests John Masino Band - JMB, a movie review by Mark Krawczyk from The Final Cut, and more! [Movie poster by Sean Hartter courtesy of Saturday Fright Special.]

Vortexx-Demon Lover-20160907_Remo DWednesday (9/7) @ 9:00 P.M. (ET)
The Vortexx premiere of

Last week we watched Remo host Demon Lover Diary, a documentary about the making of Donald (Hell Comes to Frogtown) Jackson's first low-budget horror movie, The Demon Lover. Tonight, by popular demand, we're going to show you the movie itself. This little gem has everything that a B-movie fan could expect from a film of its kind -- bad acting, lousy writing, murky camera work, a little skin (not much), a little blood, characters named after comic-book artists and movie directors, and a surprisingly accurate look at what a lot of fringe-type folks were like during the late 1970s. It's got one big-name actor (Gunnar Hansen, best known as Leatherface in Texas Chain Saw Massacre) and one real comic-book artist (Val Mayerik, best known for Howard the Duck). The demon itself is not half bad, despite the low budget. With a larger budget, its creators Dennis and Robert Skotak would go on to bigger and better things with Aliens, Terminator 2, and Titanic.

Vortexx-Tavern Maudite-20160908_Skunky Cinema

Thursday (9/8) @ 9:00 P.M. (ET)
The Vortexx premiere of

SKUNKY CINEMA with Mortimer Van Creep presents The Vortexx premiere of LA TAVERNE MAUDITE (1936) aka The Rogues' Tavern. Tonight's film is an English-language movie made in the good ole USA and released as The Rogues' Tavern. However, we're using the French poster and title so as not to create the erroneous impression that there's any connection between Morty's show and a certain group of miscreants known as The Rogue Elements. Tonight’s movie is kind of a cross between The Old Dark House and Ten Little Indians. A group of people arrive at an old hotel called the Red Rock Tavern, all having been invited by telegrams sent by a mysterious stranger. One by one, they turn up dead with crushed throats and bite marks. A wolf-dog tethered outside the tavern is the initial suspect. But a couple of small-time store detectives (Wallace Ford and Barbara Pepper), who have come to the hotel to meet a justice of the peace and get married, begin to suspect that a human is involved. As for the Rogue Elements, Sluggo has beefed up security to avoid a repetition of that unpleasant incident of last March, and with Destroyah hosting the chat, we're certain that Morty's show will run tonight without a hitch.

Vortexx-Trapped By TV-20160909_Weirdness

Friday (9/9) @ 9:00 P.M. (ET)
The Vortexx premiere of

THE WEIRDNESS REALLY BAD MOVIE with Dave Binkley and co-host Shannon Steele presents The Vortexx premiere of TRAPPED BY TELEVISION (1936). Released four months before television first became commercially available, tonight's movie is a sci-fi/comedy/mystery about a brilliant but penniless inventor (Lyle Talbot) who's working on his latest creation, a new form of television monitor and camera. His monetary problems are compounded by an aggressive bill collector looking for payments and competition from a rival scientist. When organized crime figures are added to the mix, the desperation level rises for our intrepid inventor. Tonight's show was hosted from the TV Dinner Club Museum in Akron, Ohio, where Shannon does her best to keep Dave out of trouble.

Vortexx-Live from Horrorhound Weekend-20160910_The Vortexx

Saturday (9/3) @ 9:00 P.M. (ET)
We interrupt our regular programming to bring you . . .

That's right, folks! The staff of The Vortexx are going to take a break from their partying to present a special live feed from HHW in Indianapolis. Sluggo and CJ the Werewolf will be hosting the festivities and there will be guest appearances by anyone we can round up, including we hope Dr. Lady and the Sasquatches. Instead of the usual gawd-awful movie, we will be showing cartoons and other stuff between the skits. That way, we won't have to worry about whether the segments of the movie are running in the correct order or whether we remembered to air the end of it. If you can't be in Indianapolis this weekend, this is the next best thing!

Vortexx-Bride of the Monster-20160911_Beware Theater

Sunday (9/11) @ 9:00 P.M. (ET)
The Vortexx premiere of

BEWARE THEATER with Arachna of the Spider People and her friend Deadly presents another gem from the Golden Age of Black-and-White -- Ed Wood's BRIDE OF THE MONSTER (1955). In his last starring role, an emaciated Bela Lugosi plays an aging mad scientist with a plan to create a race of supermen with the help of Tor Johnson. Bela shows off his acting chops in his memorable "Home, I Have No Home" soliloquy, and the final scene where he wrestles with a rubber octopus must be seen in order to be believed.


Welcome to The Vortexx where it's ALL HOSTS ALL THE TIME!

The Vortexx escape reality"Every day is a good day that ends in The Vortexx." You can find us at and Remember folks, we're the Gooble Gobble Channel. We accept everyone. And we will keep the doors open as long as you keep coming around! If you're a horror host looking for an additional outlet for your show, email Sluggo at

The Vortexx - Bloody Pit of Health Fitness Centers

If you don't get the results you're looking for within the eight weeks of the program, The Azure Executioner guarantees that he will personally throw you into his exclusive vat of acid!
Introducing our newest sponsor -- Bloody Pit of Health! Want to eliminate those things that interfere with the harmony of your perfect body? The Bloody Pit has all the latest fitness equipment -- weight room, Olympic-sized pool, and even a spider room. To find the location nearest you, visit their website

The Vortexx - Mummy Fart

Available in three convenient sizes!
Mummy Fart! The perfect product to get those pleasant smells out of your tomb. Available in three convenient sizes!

The Vortexx - Kurt Pasakivi's Used Car Emporium

If you're interested, just e-mail us for Kurt's current location.
Kurt Pasakivi's Used Car Emporium! At Kurt's Emporium you can buy the car of your dreams for a deep discount. If you see a car on the street that you like, just send Kurt a photo of the car and the license plate, and he'll negotiate with the owner and sell it to you at a steal!

The Vortexx - Executioner's Ale

The Official Beers of The Vortexx!
Executioner's Ale! A bloody good red ale crafted in the torture chamber of the Crimson Executioner. Sock Stout! The sock with the hops. A thick and creamy head just for you. [Sock Stout is a trademark of Raen, used with permission.]

The Vortexx - Amazon Andy

Amazon Andy is the creation of Nick Polotta, a very gifted writer and comedian who, sadly, passed away on April 13, 2013.

Totino's Pizza Rolls, Crimson Royal Jelly, and Amazon Andy's Southern Fried Tarantula Legs! The original sponsors of The Vortexx!

The Vortexx Skull Cornbread

The Official Food of The Vortexx!
Skull Cornbread! The official food of The Vortexx, served piping hot from the oven of the Crimson Executioner.

The Vortexx - Chia Host

BORDELLO OF HORROR with Freakshow airs Tuesday at 9 (ET)

Chia Host! The latest sensation from Mushnick Florists. You can see him every Tuesday night in The Vortexx!

The Vortexx - Chilly Dilly

Two delicious pickle treats!

Chilly Dilly! A delicious pickle treat that's spiced just right for every bite. And now you can "pucker up" with the all-new Chilly Dilly Lip Balm!

The Vortexx - Egg Bleach

Jason "Egg" Brown was an integral part of The Vortexx as a staff member and long-time viewer until his passing on June 27, 2016. Jason may have departed this Earth, but he will live forever in The Vortexx.

"Now that's a product I can really GET BEHIND!" -- Egg.

Egg Bleach! The all-purpose antiseptic for treatment of cuts, scratches, and abrasions. And now you can touch up those "intimate" parts of your body with the all-new Egg Anal Bleach!

Vortexx - Slugnado


Posted by Alan Smithee

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