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MOVIE REVIEW: The Human Centipede III (Final Sequence) (2015)

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By John Roisland

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The Human Centipede III
(Final Sequence)

In 2009 Tom Six shocked and, for many, disgusted, the movie industry with his release of The Human Centipede (First Sequence) - the story of a crazed doctor who surgically sewed three victims together to form a human centipede. Two short years later, he was back for the follow up with The Human Centipede 2 (Second Sequence), that movie’s viewers said was even more vile and disgusting than the original. This time around, the story of a mentally abused man, who is a fan of the movie, The Human Centipede, and wants to live out the movie by renting a dingy, dirty warehouse where he preforms less than medically precise operations on victims that he has kidnapped from the parking garage where he works.

And now for our entrée, The Human Centipede III (Final Sequence), was released by Six Entertainment Company. Three goes like this: An alcoholic, sadistic prison warden named Bill Boss (played by Dieter Laser, returning to the series after playing the insane doctor from the first film) who takes great interest in seeing his prisoners tortured by his own hands, is teamed up with Dwight Butler (Laurence R. Harvey who starred in Human Centipede II)), the warden’s sidekick and his voice of reason.

Throughout the film, Butler tries to convince Boss to stop abusing the inmates because of rising medical costs and the legal backlash. At last he tries to persuade Boss to create an inmate centipede. He outlines the pros to this: no more fights, cost cut backs on staff, housing, medical, and so on. He even goes as far as showing Boss the movie in his office, but this doesn’t work as well as he’d anticipated. When the movie is over, Boss yells about how the film was a piece of shit.

Valium BuyWhile passed out, Boss has a nightmare of being captured and raped by an inmate (Robert LaSardo from Death Race, Anarchy Parlor, Nip/Tuck) through a puncture wound in his kidneys, while being surrounded by a large group of fellow inmates. So, after this, and a prison riot, Boss rethinks his stand and decides that maybe constructing a human inmate-centipede might not be such a bad idea.

I like Tom Six, I like his vision, .... this one was just too cheeky. Now I personally also think Dieter is a scary man, but after this film, if I had to listen to Boss howl, moan, and yell in drunken stupors one more time... I most likely would have blown my own head off!

I did, however, like how the main cast of the first two were brought in to make this film together, I really did, and it was very suiting. But Six, turned a hard corner and went from the road he was on to an almost cheesy film. Sad, too, because the first two installments were, let's just say, kind of powerful and unforgettable films. Let’s face it, like them or not, you talked about them. This one lost its flair; the shock was kinda there, but the gore wasn't really even present. Disturbing in its own way, I guess, but it still didn't have the same impact. Since Six himself had a scene in the movie, I’m guessing he wanted to end this series on a slightly lighter, less serious note... I hope that was his intent anyhow.

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The film also stars Eric Roberts ( The Dark Knight, The Expendables), Bree Olsen (Live Nude Girls, Camp Massacre), and Tiny Lister (Friday, The Fifth Element)

Mr. Six, I am anxious to see what you come up with next, I really am, but if it might be a fourth installment of our centipede, I cant promise I'll be taking the time to even bother.

So, in the long run, my friends, unless you’re planning on playing this in the background of a party for for kicks, I hate to say, but DON’T BOTHER! But I have to this time around.

Stay Evil

Posted by John Roisland in MOVIE REVIEWS, REVIEWS, 2 comments
MOVIE REVIEW: Kristy (2014)

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>Directed by Oliver Blackburn

Starring: Haley Bennet, Lucas Till, and Ashley Greene

Valium Australia Online starts off with a group of hooded youths at dawn returning from an apparent murder and are seen, photographing the body of a young girl. We then move into a sequence showing a website devoted to the annihilation of "Kristy". "Kristy is pretty, pure, blessed". The site encourages users to find them, hunt them, kill them and then share the murders to the site, saying, "Kristy is a follower of God. Kill Kristy, Kill God".

Due to financial woes, young college student Justine has decided to stay on campus with her roommate Nicole for Thanksgiving break. She returns from doing laundry the first night only to discover that Nicole has gotten a surprise ski trip invitation to Aspen from her father at the last minute. Nicole ends up leaving Justine alone in the dorm but only after leaving her the keys to her BMW to use while she's gone.

On the second day, Justine goes on a run for some Ben and Jerry's and through a creepy encounter at a convenience store with a strange young woman, she unknowingly becomes a target for a group of violent cult members who are after "Kristy", because they believe her to be a privileged girl due to her appearance and the car she is in. Little do they know she is on a work study program and the car is not her own.

She is tormented by a group led by the woman from the convenience store on the short drive back to the campus, and narrowly avoids an altercation. A dangerous and deadly game of cat and mouse quickly ensues and before the night is through, she must dig deep and find the strength and courage to conquer her fears, fight back and outwit the murderous cult in order to stay alive...

I am a sucker for home invasion type films, and I also really enjoy films where the female protagonist suddenly grows a pair and turns around and brutally kicks some antagonist ass. Kristy is kind of a mash up of The Strangers and You're Next all rolled into one and I really enjoyed watching intended victim Justine get even with her cult crazed stalkers. The film is geared towards survival rather than revenge and thus is somewhat light on gore, but there were some great kills in spite of that, although I wish there had been a few more.

There is minimal character development to be had in the film but for me personally that made it more effective. Sometimes fucked up shit happens to people for no good reason and for me that's what makes this film frightening. Stuff like that truly scares the shit out of me. If you've ever done the babysitting gig in an old creepy house or been in a big building alone, this film will make you uneasy and maybe even raise your blood pressure a little.

While a bit predictable and filled with jump scares, Kristy is a tense, beautifully shot thriller that kept me on the edge of my seat through a good portion of its run. The film’s overall sense of creepiness is bolstered by the direction of Oliver Blackburn (Donkey Punch) and the performances of Haley Bennet (The Haunting of Molly Hartley) as the proposed victim and Ashley Green (Twilight) as gang leader Violet, who both really deliver in their respective roles. While Kristy is nothing ground breaking by any means, it is definitely worth a watch if you are into psychological thrillers. I could think of far worse ways to spend an afternoon.

I give Kristy 7/10

Posted by Amy Mead in MOVIE REVIEWS, REVIEWS, 0 comments
MOVIE REVIEW: The Last Witch Hunter (2015)

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Sometimes I think I go in search of bad films. Not just bad films like Buy Diazepam Pharmastores or Plan 9 From Outer Space, that are at least fun, but really bad films. That could explain why I went to see The Last Witch Hunter in the theater. The Last Witch Hunter is the newest film from Vin Diesel and Director Breck Eisner (The Crazies),

Now it's not the worst film I have ever seen, but I wasn't expecting it to be good when I made the decision to go. While I am occasionally fooled, and end up liking a film like Hansel and Grete :Witch Hunters, I just don’t trust these big slick “horror” movies. If I do have a unconscious desire to see bad films, then at least on that point, The Last Witch Hunter didn't really let me down.

On the good side it had a pretty decent cast. The title role was, of course played buy Vin Diesal (Riddick). I really like Vin, I do, but he does a lot of crappy movies. Also starring in The Last Witch Hunter, was Elijah Wood (Maniac), Rose Leslie (Game of Thrones), Michael Caine (What the hell hasn't he been in?) and Order Cheap Valium Online (The Strain) as the Witch Queen.

On the bad side, it's another CGI fest of monsters and magic without any real soul. Vin is Vin, he's pretty much playing some version of Riddick in every movie. He's like a Tom Cruise that I don't feel guilty for liking. If you love Vin, you will probably enjoy him here, just don't look for any substance.

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Rose Leslie, Elijah Wood, and VIn Diesel in The Last Witch Hunter

Elijah Wood kind of disappointed me, with his character, and even just for being in The Last Witch Hunter. It's such a step backward from his performance in Maniac. He comes off as a weak, spineless character that Frodo would kick sand on at the beach. And the story is so transparent that you pretty much know what’s up with his character the moment he first appears on screen. It's so apparent that when it doesn't happen within his first ten minutes on screen, you start to think it's a red herring.

The whole story is pretty easy to figure out. Really, it was a bit annoying to be watching Vin and company scratching their heads trying to figure out something that was pretty obvious from the beginning. Apparently it isn't only Jon Snow who knows nothing, eh Rose?

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You know nothing Vin Diesel, seriously dude, nothing.
Rose Leslie in The Last Witch Hunter

There was one line that I noted as somewhat interesting. When Leslie's good witch character is talking about the Salem Witch Trials and Diesel tells her that Salem was a horrible mistake, she asks if he would feel the same way if the women really were witches. It's interesting because we know now that the trials were about jealousy, spite, and land grabs and most likely those hung knew little if anything about witchcraft. How would we look at Salem now, with our more progressive and accepting society if the women really were witches or wiccans?

But that's about as deep as this movie gets. Any other questions of the morality of witchcraft and witch hunters is at about the same level of Glenda asking Dorothy if shes a good witch or bad.

If you are a fan of these type of horror/fantasy films, you might like The Last Witch Hunter. But there are better films out there, like Hansel and Gretel: Witch Hunters. It is slightly better than Keanu's Constantine, but not much. I really didn't hate it, I just really didn't like it very much. It's like Willie said, full of sound and fury but meh. I doubt I will watch it again unless it's on Netflix and I'm bored, 4 out of 10 CGI stars.

Posted by Allen Alberson in MOVIE REVIEWS, REVIEWS, 0 comments
MOVIE REVIEW: Harbinger Down (2015)

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Want to see something that looks promising at first glance but doesn't take long to go spiraling down the shitter? Look no further than Harbinger Down: a creature feature that would otherwise be ignored by one and all were it not for the pedigree that it manages to boast in terms of just how the film is made up. Directed by Alec Gillis and produced by Tom Woodruff (aka the guys who have worked on previous films in the Alien franchise) and proudly boasting that it features all practical effects work, Harbinger Down is a glorious failure indeed.

The story revolves around some asshole grad students that take a trip on a commercial fish trawler piloted by the grandfather (Lance Henriksen) of one of them, in an effort to study the effects of global warming on whales or some shit. They discover a crashed Soviet spacecraft in the ocean, which still contains the dead pilot as well as the experiment contained wherein that soon grows, infects, and kills off the crew. Yes, it sounds like a much less imaginative take on The Thing, and that's because it really is. The acting is lame, the characters are lame, the whole affair is super predictable, and it really is for the most part just a plain old bore.

Now, let's talk about the effects of Harbinger Down, which as I said before, proudly boasts about the fact that they are practical. Well, I really can't confirm if EVERY part of the creature effects are practical, but what I can say is that it is refreshing to see practical effects take center stage for the first time in a long time...or that is what I would say if said effects actually looked as great as I wished they did. I don't want to shit on the work done here, because I know how hard it is to do this kind of thing, but the creature looks just aren't convincing one bit. There is good use made of stop-motion effects, miniatures, and animatronics in addition to some of the prosthetic effects, but the full-on body shots of the film's monsters are laughable at first glance. The effects were done by ADI, who also did the practical effects for the 2011 take on The Thing, which chances are you never saw because their work was discarded in favor of the shitty CGI that was seen in the final cut of the movie. ADI ended up funding this film on Kickstarter, out of the desire to bring practical effects back to the forefront. While I may not have enjoyed this film, I will gladly say that those guys have my respect for that alone. Practical effects work is a dying thing, and the film world is a worse place without it.

All in all, Harbinger Down is a brisk but sadly disappointing creature feature that ends up coming off as a just plain stupid version of The Thing. The practical effects that it boasts about having are a mixed bag, but at the same time, it's just so good and refreshing to see them take the forefront in a horror film again. It's not god-awful and you can certainly do worse with this kind of thing to kill an afternoon, so give it a shot at your own risk.

Rating: 2/5/5

Posted by Nick Durham in MOVIE REVIEWS, REVIEWS, 0 comments

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Directed by Felipe Eluti and released March 24, 2015 by Unearthed Films, Buy Diazepam Actavis is a descent into depravity as a washed up boxer finds himself at the mercy of an unimaginable evil that lives in his psyche. As his torture escalates at the hands of this female visage, his grip on reality slowly spirals into madness and he seeks out victims to inhumanely torture at the request of his mentor in torture, the nameless female figure. When a man has lost it all, what is left but the raw carnal need to inflict pain on those that he stumbles upon?

Story wise the movie keeps you disoriented by shuffling from past, middle, and present with only head and facial hair as a signifier that any amount of time has passed. One minute you start off in the beginning as The Boxer is furiously training, and then the movie interjects snippets of morbid visions of a bleeding duct taped victim strung from the ceiling. The film definitely keeps you on your toes without allowing you a structured timeline, but with The Boxer losing his grip on sanity, it helps to symbolize his decent into darkness.

The moments between The Boxer and his female tormentor at no point feel like they're just a mental fabrication. They feel unbelievably real and, for that reason, straddle the line of reality and believability. The method by which she tortures him is a twisted, morbid spin on the whole mistress/slave dominatrix BDSM fetishism, and much of the film finds bondage in general via ropes showcased very attentively as The Boxer intricately ties complex knots with great care, binding his victims before mercilessly torturing them.

The torment that the Boxer unleashes on his victims is, at times, anywhere between savagely brutal and mentally cruel. During one scene he binds a female victim to another male victim and after murdering the male victim, leaves him bound to the still alive female to decompose, her face pressed firmly against his corpse. The majority of the torture scenes are sadistic and callous, with eyes being cut out and the open wound being used for sexual gratification in an intense boundary pushing scene that is both disturbing and mesmerizing.

In conclusion, Visceral: Between the Ropes of Madness is an absolute exercise in extremes balanced with the morbid beauty of the fetish culture of bondage. For viewers who seek out extreme horror regularly, this film delivers every bit of the gruesome, morally absent violence that you could ever want. This film is the equivalent of a Mexican cartel decapitation video fisting 50 Shades of Grey, and you will never be the same afterwards.

Rating: 7/10

Posted by Travis Love in MOVIE REVIEWS, REVIEWS, 0 comments
BLU-RAY REVIEW: The Brood (1979)

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When it comes to body horror, no one does it like David Cronenberg. From Shivers to Rabid to Videodrome, Cronenberg's early work could fuck with your head and make your stomach churn like no other director in the horror business. One film that often falls by the wayside, at least when it comes to casual fans of his work, is his 1979 film, The Brood. Originally reviled by critics upon its initial release, The Brood is now often recognized as an oft-maligned classic of the director's filmography. I don't know if I'd really call it a classic, but that's where we are.

Anyway, the story of The Brood revolves around a man named Frank (Art Hindle) investigating the strange therapy techniques of psychologist Hal Raglan (Oliver Reed), and the effects they are having on Frank's institutionalized wife Nola (Samantha Eggar). Nola had a very traumatic upbringing, and Frank worries for the future of their young daughter Candice (Cindy Hinds). Eventually people linked to Nola begin being attacked by groups of seemingly deformed children, all the while Frank gets closer to learning the truth of the effects that Raglan's methods have had on his wife.

While The Brood may sound like a science gone mad-style of film, it really isn't at its heart. Like many of Cronenberg's other works from this era, this film focuses on the impact of the psychological torment that one can withstand before it starts manifesting itself in a physical nature, i.e. what we all know as the body horror sub-genre. Like I said before, nobody can do body horror like Cronenberg could. We get a nasty end result to everything to, with a shocker of a reveal at the film's climax to boot.

Now while The Brood is well shot, very well acted, and manages to leave a bit of a lasting impression, it just doesn't have that gut-wrenching impact that Cronenberg's more well-known works manage to have. That and the fact that somehow, some way, I just have a harder time believing a story about the physical manifestations of someone's psychological rage wreaking havoc than I do a vagina-looking VCR undulating from someone's chest cavity. I don't know, call me weird I guess. No matter what, The Brood has never really hit me in the way that Shivers, Rabid, Videodrome, The Fly, or even Naked Lunch could do to me.

Criterion's Blu-ray release is wonderful, as to be expected. The film's picture and sound are phenomenal, undoubtedly the best I've seen and heard it ever. There's a new documentary about the making of the film as well as delving into Cronenberg's early work, plus a 2011 interview with Cronenberg and Fangoria's Chris Alexander. Cronenberg's 1970 film Crimes of the Future is included here as well, which is also remastered for Blu-ray capabilities. There's also an appearance of Oliver Reed on The Merv Griffin Show. I will not comment on the state of his sobriety during this appearance.

So yeah, I've never been much of a fan of The Brood to say it lightly. It's not a terrible film, not one damn bit, but I find it hard to classify it as iconic as a majority of Cronenberg's filmography is. Like I said before, maybe it's just me, but it's never effected me like it has so many others. Either way, if you're a fan of this film, pick up this Blu-ray for the features alone.

Rating: 3/5


Posted by Nick Durham in MOVIE REVIEWS, REVIEWS, 0 comments
HALLOWEEN HORRORS: The Exorcist (1973)

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Director: William Friedkin; Writer: William Peter Blatty; Stars: Max von Sydow, Linda Blair, Ellen Burstyn; Rating: R; Run Time: 122 min; Genre: Horror; Country: USA; Language: English; Year: 1973

When a teenage girl (Linda Blair) is possessed by a mysterious entity, her mother (Ellen Burstyn) seeks the help of two priests (Max von Sydow and Jason Miller) to save her daughter. (Summary from IMDb.)

Saturday nights in 8th grade consisted of MTV's Headbanger's Ball, followed by whatever movie I happened to find on television. There were always a variety of B movies, Kung Fu or cheesy comedies on at that hour. Sometimes, I'd get lucky and find a great horror flick. In October, MTV, USA, and TBS all showed horror movies later at night. It was heaven! There was no internet or Netflix, and the only video rental place in town was in the local grocery store. Pickins were slim!

It was on one of those October Saturday nights when I happened upon The Exorcist for the very first time. I'm pretty sure it was on TBS, which of course meant editing for content. They were able to get away with a bit more at 3 am than they could during regular viewing hours, but a lot of the more graphic scenes were cut. Even so, it was enough to scare me and leave a permanent mark on my psyche.

I was raised Roman Catholic, and even though I left the Church and Christianity at the age of 13, some of the imagery and dogma still hangs around in the back of my head. The idea of demonic possession is terrifying! Being under the control of some other being that you can't see and can't defend yourself against...yeah screw that!

The wonderful makeup artistry of legends of the industry Buy Diazepam 10Mg Bulk and Cheap Valium For Sale Uk, combined with years of catechism classes, and a well written story by Valium Sales Online created nightmare material for days! Eileen Dietz as the demonic face still creeps me out to this day. And poor Regan (Linda Blair) when she is fully possessed by Valium Online Buy Uk...thank you Mr. Smith and Mr. Baker for makeup no one will ever forget! You provided nightmarish images for generations to come.

Even though the movie gave me nightmares that night (thanks Ms. Dietz!), I wasn't satisfied with just seeing the edited for content version of the film. A few days later, I mentioned seeing the movie to my mother. Thinking I'd probably get flack for staying up that late and for watching the Exorcist, I was beyond shocked when she responded with, "You need to see the WHOLE movie!" She actually took me to the video rental counter at Glen's Market and surprisingly enough, they had ONE VHS copy of The Exorcist. We took it home and watched it that day. MIND BLOWN! I had missed so much disturbing stuff watching it on basic cable. I experienced that mind blown sensation again several years later when the Director's Cut was released on DVD.

I went on to later read the novel by Blatty, that the movie is based on. And much later, the actual case that inspired the novel. I actually used it, and some creepy props, as a part of a visual display of the staff's favorite books when I worked at the local public library. And every October, without fail, I watch the Director's Cut. It just isn't Halloween without Regan, Captain Howdy and Pazuzu!

Final Verdict: 10 out of 10 "Powers of Christ compel you!"

Posted by Machete Von Kill in MOVIE REVIEWS, REVIEWS, 0 comments
HALLOWEEN HORRORS: An American Werewolf in London (1981)

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Buy Valium Australia1981 brought to us a film classic, a movie that to this day still tops the charts of being one horror's most loved. I am referring to John Landis' An American Werewolf in London. Landis, who brought us Animal House and The Blues Brothers (two of my favorites), decided to give the horror industry a shot but adding his trademark flavor of humor. Combining these two elements, along with master special effects by genius Rick Baker (Men in Black, Star Wars (1977), Planet of the Apes (2001)) and a great storyline, took him straight to the top of the box office.

David Naughton (Hot Dog the Movie) plays David Kessler who is on a college trip backpacking across Europe with his long time friend Jack Goodman, played by Griffin Dunne (After Hours, My Girl). After being warned to “stick to the road” and “beware the moon” by country folk in the English farm lands, the two find themselves being attacked by a werewolf in the middle of an open field and under the light of the full moon.


David wakes some weeks later in a hospital in London, only to find out that Jack died in the attack but that he himself had survived only with scratches. During his brief hospital stay, Jack visits David to inform him that he was killed by the same werewolf that merely scratched David. Jack tells him that he will become a werewolf, too. David dismisses the visit and is released from the hospital to stay with Nurse Alex Price, played by Jenny Agutter (Captain America: The Winter Soldier, Logan's Run), who caught his eye at the hospital. While staying with her, David goes through changes, both physically and mentally. He thinks he's going mad and is sure that he is becoming like the monster that attacked him. The full moon is making him crazy, and he wakes naked in strange parts of the city with while David has no recollection of the night before. Later he learns of people who had been slaughtered and torn to pieces during the night on that night's evening news.

David is sure he's gone mad as he is again visited by his deceased friend Jack, now accompanied by the people that David has killed. They all warn him of the full moon and that he must take his life before hand or many others will be murdered by his hands.

On the night of the full moon, David as he transforms into the wild beast and sets out to hunt. His new-found love and flat mate is worried sick about him as she now believes in his obsession with and fear of becoming a monster and hurting people. Desperate, she notifies the police who are now on the look out for him.

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The ending of the movie is filmed in busy Piccadilly Square and it is INCREDIBLE! From car crashes to cops getting their heads bitten off by the large werewolf... well, it's pretty fucking awesome! Since the movie has been out for 34 years, yeah, I'm going to drop a spoiler!

Spoiler Alert
David in werewolf form is now trapped at the end of an alley with no escape. Completely surrounded by cops with guns drawn. His new love runs through the line of officers and down the alley after David. She slows as she approaches the large beast, stares him softly in the eyes, and say “David”, the beast’s eyes,relax for a moment, and at that moment he tries lunging to attack her. Instantly a storm of gunfire is let out on the beast. Alex sees this, cries, and the camera pans down to the now dead, bullet-ridden body of David.

Music cues, and credits roll!

If, by chance, you have never seen this work of art, you need to... after I kick you in the throat! This film was — and, in my opinion, is STILL — ahead of its time! The work that Rick Baker alone did on this film has been tried by many others, and have all failed! The transformation scene is second to NONE!!

This is not my favorite horror film, but it is close. It is, however, one of my top choices even though it’s neither scary nor spooky, to watch during the 31 Days of Horror.

Posted by John Roisland in MOVIE REVIEWS, REVIEWS, 0 comments
MOVIE REVIEW: Blood Glacier (2013)

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Director: Marvin Kren; Writers: Benjamin Hessler (screenplay), Marvin Kren (screenplay contributor), Claudia Kolland (dramatization); Stars: Gerhard Liebmann, Edita Malovcic, Santos, Hille Beseler, Peter Knaack, Felix Römer, Brigitte Kren; Rating: Not Rated; Run Time: 98 min; Genre: Horror; Country: Austria; Language: German | English; Year: 2013

Valium Online Norge (or Blutgletscher in the original German) is a 2013 offering from director Marvin Kren (Rammbock) and Allegro Film. Set in a 2014 where climate change/global warming has progressed beyond man's ability to reverse the damage, Blood Glacier examines the possibility of something very old and very dangerous coming to light in a world that has moved so far beyond it as to consider it myth or legend. Scientists in the Austrian Alps studying geological and climatological changes are at odd ends when an alarm sounds, necessitating technician Janek (Gerhard Liebmann) check out the equipment. Janek, accompanied by his dog Tinni (Santos) and meteorologist Falk (Peter Knaack), discovers a glacier that appears to be leaking blood. Intrigued, Falk decides to collect a sample for analysis back at the camp.

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The liquid from the glacier affects all who ingest it and nobody is immune to its affects. As the crew prepares for a visit from the Ministerin (Brigitte Kren) (Of what? We do not know.), they argue about just what should be revealed. Naturally, the majority vote is to keep it secret until they learn more about it. With the Ministerin and her entourage approaching and who knows what type of mutant animal hybrids on the loose, anything could happen.

Blood Glacier has all the elements of a fun horror movie – interesting plot, fun characters, no jump scares, and creatures straight out of an opium-induced hallucination. Additionally, there is a seemingly irrelevant love story that pays off at the end. There are strong performances all around, with the scientists believing themselves to be above technician Janek and vice versa. The Ministerin is an especially fun character who takes charge as soon as she is aware that something has gone very wrong. She also has the best line of dialogue in the entire movie. People die. Creatures die. But the mutation, by its very nature, adapts and survives.

The English language version suffers from bad voice acting for the main characters, specifically Janek, but is an otherwise enjoyable movie.

Posted by Woofer McWooferson in MOVIE REVIEWS, REVIEWS, 0 comments
HALLOWEEN HORRORS: The Collector (2009)

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In 2009, Marcus Dunstan, who brought you such titles as Saw IV and Saw V, brought you his clever game of cat and mouse, The Collector. This 90 minute sleeper, released by Vivendi and Genius Entertainment, unfortunately didn't do much at the box office, but was a bit of a hit with the rental market and with me!

Josh Stewart (The Dark Knight Rises , The Curious Case of Benjamin Button) stars as Arkin, an ex-con turned handy man who is trying to make good in life as well as make good to the loan shark that his wife racked up some hefty bills with while trying to stay afloat while Arkin was in the joint. Arkin offers to settle up by doing a job in his wealthy client’s home since he and his family are preparing to leave for a family vacation.

Both parties agree, but unfortunately for our star, someone has laid claim to this house first. Only difference is, this guy’s not there to rob them of jewelry; he robs them of lives. The Collector, played by Juan Fernandez (A Man Apart), has already settled in and transformed the house into a giant booby-trap full of torturous devices making it nearly impossible to escape.

Arkin arrives at the house to steal his new wealth, when he comes across the homeowners who are being held a giant foot locker. They warn him of the intruder and try to sneak out only to find themselves encountering deadly trap after deadly trap. You see, our new found collector, collects bodies. Tortures, murders, keeps them for his...collection.

I will say that there is a feeling of the Saw series present in the film. Even though this may not be as over the top or action packed as Saw, and sometimes it gets kinda slow, they did a good job with it. The film and lighting captured the feel of desperate people caught in their own home transformed into traps as well as the feel of The Collector’s driving need to collect. Some of the torture scenes were pretty original and gory. I have got to give props when they are due. While having a good blood and gore level, the film still held a nice atmosphere of suspense for its audience.

The film I thought ended perfectly into the ending credits...yes, also leaving it open for a sequel, that I'd rather not even discuss!

This one is a great watch. It keeps your interest without overdoing it. The acting, while maybe not being spot on by all of the cast, most still give a worthy performance. I do certainly enjoy this film, and suggest that if you haven't checked it out, that you do so!

Posted by John Roisland in MOVIE REVIEWS, REVIEWS, 0 comments
MOVIE REVIEW: Bone Tomahawk (2015)

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Usually when I get excited for a movie it leads to disappointment, so I went intoOrder Valium Online Legal with some trepidation. However, this is one of those rare times that I walked away happy. Bone Tomahawk is everything it promised. Horror films that flirt with the Western genre don't have a great track record, there are a few good ones like High Plains Drifter, but many more that just don’t cut it, like Gallows Walker and The Killing Box. Bone Tomahawk is one of the good ones, one of the best.

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Kurt Russell in Bone Tomahawk

In Bone Tomahawk, a pair of murderous thieves, played by Sid Haig and David Arquette, inadvertently lead a tribe of cannibalistic troglodytes back to a peaceful western community. There they kidnap several townspeople in the middle of the night. The next morning the Sheriff (Kurt Russell) leads a small but determined posse in an attempt to get them back. The posse includes Matthew Fox (Lost) as a local gunman and Indian fighter, Richard Jenkins (Burn After Reading) as back up deputy Chicory, and Patrick Wilson (The Conjuring), whose wife was taken by the cannibals. But the trail to the missing townspeople may be as dangerous as the troglodytes themselves.

Bone Tomahawk does so many things right. It's a horror movie, but it is also a legitimate western. You can completely remove the horror tag, and western fans will be able to enjoy it. The horror aspect doesn't really kick in till over half way into the film. There are a few brutal scenes early on, but I was beginning to believe it was going to be simply a cowboy film. Then the posse makes it to the cave of the troglodytes.

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Dear people talking about how extreme the gore was in Valium Online Purchase, check out Bone Tomahawk. While scene for scene it might not contain as much gore, Bone Tomahawk is more squirm-inducing than The Green Inferno. There is one scene that looks incredibly real and it looks to be all practical effects. You want a hard to watch kill scene? Watch Bone Tomahawk.

And it's not just gore that makes this film work. Russell is excellent as an aging sheriff. He might not be as fast, or as smart as some of the members of the posse, but he is determined, honorable (to a fault at times), and wise. He's also tired, and you can see the weight of the bad decisions on his face. He seems to know this is his last hurrah and he will save his people, even if he doesn't come back alive.

Matthew Fox's character is almost immediately unlikeable. Along the trail we learn about his history, and why he hates Native Americans. He becomes a valuable asset, and by the end I had actually developed some respect for him.

Patrick Wilson ends up being the most unlikely hero of them all. Shackled with a bad leg, that's getting worse along the way, he still plays a major part in the resolution. His wife (Lili Simmons) is one of the townspeople kidnapped by the trogs, and he will die to get her back. It is slightly telegraphed that he is going to “save the day” and while logically it might seem contrived, it never feels that way in the film. Instead of shaking my head and laughing, I was cheering him and the rest of the posse on.

On of my favorite characters was Richard Jenkins as Chicory. He is almost a stereotypical western deputy, but it works perfectly. He's fiercely loyal to Sheriff Hunt and determined to follow him into danger. He adds a lot to the western feel. He's a throw back to great western characters like Pea in Lonesome Dove and Mose in The Searchers. There isn't a lot of humor in Bone Tomahawk, but most of it is provided by Jenkins.

One of the things I most disliked about The Green Inferno was the injection of humor into the film. The cannibal films that The Green Inferno paid homage too weren't funny. They were brutal, depressing, and dark. It's almost Eli's calling card to inject humor into his gore fests. It works at times, but with Bone Tomahawk, director Order Valium From Mexico(in his directorial debut) plays it straight, with no silly comedy or fart jokes. There are some small humorous moments, but they are all natural and develop from the characters, mostly Chicory’s personality.

Bone Tomahawk takes it time developing. It's a bit of a slow burn as the posse takes time to get to its destination, but it's never boring. The group of would be heroes face adversity every step. There's a run in with bandits that leaves the men on foot. There are battles not only with the horse thieves but with themselves, and with the infection raging in Wilson's leg. The trek there also gives them time for character development that seems natural and unforced. It might be slow, but it is never boring.

Some people may claim it isn't really horror, but it contains suspense, murder, cannibalism, and on screen gore. It's a horror movie. Maybe it's not supernatural, but it's horror. And it's also a legitimate western. I just love this film, no holds barred and no reservations. It is a slow burn, but it isn't boring and the pay off is totally worth it. I give Bone Tomahawk my highest rating, 10 out of 10.

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Kurt Russell, Matthew Fox, and Richard Jenkins in Bone Tomahawk

Posted by Allen Alberson in MOVIE REVIEWS, REVIEWS, 0 comments
HALLOWEEN HORRORS: Vampire Hunter D (1985)

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I'm not that big a fan of anime, and never really have been. I'm not shitting on it or anything, I've just never been super into anime in general. That being said, there are a healthy number of anime films that I have enjoyed throughout the years, ranging from Akira to Wicked City to Ghost in the Shell. One of my all time favorites, and probably the only one (besides Perfect Blue) that finds its way on my TV around Halloween time is the original 1985 film Vampire Hunter D. Brutal, violent, and loaded with some haunting imagery, Vampire Hunter D is just wonderful.

Taking place in the distant, post-apocalyptic future, Vampire Hunter D revolves around the half-human/half vampire dhampir vampire hunter only known as D. D has been hired by the teenage Doris to protect her against the ancient vampire lord Count Magnus Lee, who intends to make Doris his bride. It doesn't take long for D to face off against Lee and his monstrous mutant minions, culminating in a Gothic bloodbath.

Recognized as one of the first anime films of its era to be targeted at an adult audience rather than a younger one, Vampire Hunter D packs on the blood, guts, and occasional boobs. It's nasty and often inventive, and you can't help but enjoy it for what it is. The animation hasn't aged all that well, but considering that the film is 30 years old, this is forgivable. Not to mention the fact that the imagery on display is well drawn and the character models still manage to hold up as well, despite the fact they don't move all that fluidly.
Based on a long running series of Japanese novels (none of which I've ever read), the original Vampire Hunter D isn't just a landmark of horror anime, but of anime in general. Even if you're not a huge fan of anime at all, you should at the very least check this out. There was an American-produced sequel in the early 2000s that is gorgeous to look at, but shares little with the heart that this film has. Regardless, give Vampire Hunter D a look; you'll be glad that you did.

Posted by Nick Durham in MOVIE REVIEWS, REVIEWS, 0 comments

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Directed by Anthony Matthews and released in 2015 on Best Valium Online Revenge is Her Middle Name tells the story of a calculative downtrodden hooker named Kat, who has plans of changing her life for the better by any means necessary. Unfortunately for Kat, her pimp doesn't hand out a severance package or 4-Ho-1k to hos that betray him. What follows is an unbridled ride full of twists and turns and a few tricks pulled by the whore with a bloodlust for gore.

The plot line is as follows:
1.) Kat discovers that after countless tries she's finally become pregnant with the assistance of her dope fiend boyfriend.
2.) They formulate a plan to rob Kat's pimp to keep themselves in drugs, upon robbing her pimp Kat backstabs her boyfriend and bolts for a better life.
3.) Her pimp catches up to Kat after a some time and his posse has an all-you-can-rape buffet leaving Kat broken, bleeding, and childless.
4.) Kat begins to hunt down each member of her pimp's posse and dishes out her gruesome revenge Costco bulk style leading to her eventual main target...her pimp.

Have you ever wondered what it would be like if the gritty depression of Combat Shock and the unmerciful brutality of I Spit On Your Grave hooked up, and bumped genitals on a soiled mattress in a seedy alleyway? Well this movie is totally the bastard love child of that hump session in the best way possible! Every bit as dirty as it is bloody, the film leaves you feeling tainted by its unbelievable filthy sexiness, but begs you not to use protection so that you can enjoy the feeling (oh and you will!).

If anything can be said of 'Revenge is Her Middle Name' it's that it wins the hearts of Revenge film aficionados like a hooker shooting ping pong balls out of her ham wallet at a bachelor party, it makes you stare at it in awe and bewilderment. The story is filled with unapologetic risqué dialog that is every bit as enjoyable as the violence. During the rape scene you feel the tension building to the boiling point that will eventually explode into a tidal wave of epic revenge!

Anthony Matthews is definitely a talent to watch as his writing finds something often missing in indie cinema, actual plot twists. So many times during the film it directs you to one conclusion but immediately finds betrayal or hidden facts that don't come into play until later..or sometimes until the very end of the film. It's amazing when a film doesn't just give you all facts in a linear fashion, but leaves surprises and story arks to keep you on your toes.

The violence unleashed upon Kat's transgressors is completely bloody and cathartic as she dispatches her own brand of twisted justice. Sometimes dehumanizing and humiliating her victims before slitting their throats cold and void of any emotion but rage. The glory hole scene alone will have you covering your mouth in the grandest "Holy fucking shit!" moment ever. Horror nerd boners will be bountiful upon watching this film.

In conclusion Revenge is Her Middle Name has to be hands down one of my personal favorites to be released this year. If revenge films are your jam then you owe it to yourself to find this film and love it to death like that hamster you wouldn't quit petting in grade school. To quote Kat's pimp, "Blood and semen will spray in a frenzy of revenge", and I loved every minute of it!

Rating: 9/10


Posted by Travis Love in MOVIE REVIEWS, REVIEWS, 0 comments

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The Wild Man of the Navidad


I finally knocked this off my personal list of shame. OK normally a list of shame would be classic horror movies like Night of the Living Dead, The Hills Have Eyes, or Halloween, and not a low budget indy film out of Texas. But I love Bigfoot movies, evenBuy Msj Valium Online, and have a special place in my heart for the cinema of Charles B Pierce.

And to be honest, I heard quiet a bit of buzz about The Wild Man of the Navidad not long after it was released. I just never took the time to find it. Mea Culpa and my loss. But I have rectified that mistake after finding it streaming recently. And I have been kicking myself ever since for waiting this long to see it. Yes, it's that good.

The movie is based off rumors of a Bigfoot type creature that inhabits the lowlands around the Navidad river in Texas. Dubbed The Wild Man of the Navidad or sometimes just “The Thing that comes” it would invade local farms and steal food and other items.

The film, The Wild Man of the Navidad, is loosely based on these legends and a fictional diary of Dale Rogers. Rogers is supposedly a descendant of Samuel C.A. Rogers, who figures in the wild man legends. Rogers owns a large area of land along the Navidad River that he keeps closed to hunting. Hard times force him to open the land to earn money, even though he knows something large and hungry lives in the bottom lands. Before long Dale sees his worst nightmares come true, as hunters go missing and the Wild Man of the Navidad goes on a bloody rampage.

For a ultra low budget film the Wild Man of the Navidad is just exceptional. Even judged by higher budget films it's still a great film. It's purposely shot in similar style to the films of Charles B. Pierce, such as The Town that Dreaded Sundown, and his Bigfoot classic, The Legend of Boggy Creek. If you aren't a fan of Pierce and his films, (shame on you), you might not enjoy Wild Man quite as much as me, but you should still find yourself having a good time. It's a good film.

The Wild Man of the Navidad does vary from the work of Pierce in some ways. For one thing, Wild Man is bloodier than either Boggy Creek or Sundown. And the violence is shown well lit and right in front of you. The Town That Dreaded Sundown is a violent film itself but it's not as bloody as The Wild Man of the Navidad. I didn't mind the violence but my only real complaint is the gore was really hurt by the small budget. I honestly rather not see the gore if it can't be done well. To the directors credit there was only one scene that really bothered me. All the other scenes the gore and violence served the film well.

The creature itself is a violent SOB. While he isn't as down right nasty as the Bigfoot in Buy Diazepam Pharmastores, he's no Harry and the Hendersons either. In the beginning of the movie there is something of a detente between the creature and Dale. Dale provides it raw meat, and the creature leaves a offering and for the most part, leaves the family alone. But as Dale's hired hand Mario notices the creature is getting hungrier, and soon the family dog goes missing. Still until Dale breaks the truce by allowing hunters onto the land, the creature is fairly peaceful.

Unlike the Bigfoot movies of the 70s, the filmmakers decide to let us see the creature out in the open daylight several times. Even with the best budget this can be killer, but their creature is almost completely covered with scraps of cloth. Even it's hands are hidden as it uses two sets of antlers to lift, strike and kill with. It's really a cool way to show the monster while keeping it hidden. It also plays on the legends of the Wildman as a thief of farms and houses. When the creature is finally shown uncovered it's an original design that doesn't much resemble the conventional descriptions of Bigfoot.

Also dissimilar to most Bigfoot movies, the encroachment on his land isn't really based on greed or hubris, but on survival. Dale Rogers, played by co-director Justin Meeks is a decent man. He's struggling to survive and provide for himself and his invalid wife Jean (Stacy Meeks). He loses his job early on and sees little choice but to open his land. There seems almost a sadness in Dale about opening his land. Maybe not so much for the people killed, but for the fact that things have changed. He's basically caused the eventual end of the Wild Man, and an end to a way of life.

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Justin Meeks from The Wild Man of the Navidad

The only really evil person in the film is Dale's handyman Mario (Alex Garcia), and he's pretty despicable. Our first look at Mario is him smelling Jean's panties while he masturbates. We later find out he routinely assaults and sexually abuses the near comatose and helpless Jean whenever Dale isn't around. The sicko Mario is the one character you really enjoy seeing get his just desserts.

The Wild Man of the Navidad features mostly unknown actors, but look for a cameo from producer Kim Henkel. Henkel is best know as a writer and producer on the original Texas Chainsaw Massacre. Co-director Duane Graves also has a small role. Meeks and Graves were both screenwriting and production students of Henkel. A lot of the townies seen on screen were actual locals of the small Texas film where it was shot, and it adds a realness to the film. Watching the scenes in town it's easy to imagine you are sitting in a drive-in theater enjoy a film from a different era.

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For bringing back memories of my childhood, but still presenting an original and enjoyable film experience, I'm giving The Wild Man of the Navidad a healthy 8 out of 10 stars. I really love it and regret waiting this long to watch it. Don't wait, find it streaming somewhere and watch it, late at night with the lights low.

Posted by Allen Alberson in MOVIE REVIEWS, REVIEWS, 0 comments
HALLOWEEN HORRORS: Trick Or Treat (1986)

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Director: Charles Martin Smith

Starring: Marc Price, Tony Fields, Lisa Orgolini, Gene Simmons, and Ozzy Osbourne


Eddie is an outcast in his high school who is often bullied by jocks and is a total loner. He doesn't have many friends but the one thing he does have that gets him through it all is heavy metal.

He is a huge of fan of controversial (and rumored Satanist) musician, Sammi Curr who just happens to be from Eddie's own hometown and is coming home to play the High School's annual Halloween Dance. One night after writing Sammi a letter, he learns that his idol has been banned from performing at the dance. Before he even has time to react, He hears another report about how Sammi Curr has died in a mysterious and fatal fire and this news of course, tears Eddie apart.

He visits his friend, local DJ, "Nuke" to commiserate on the loss of Sammi and knowing what a massive fan Eddie was, Nuke gives him Sammi's final album "Songs In The Keys of Death". It is the only one in existence and it has never been released. Nuke explains the he has recorded it and plans to play it in tribute to Sammi at Midnight on Halloween, stating that's what Sammi's original intentions for it were anyway.

Eddie soon figures out there are hidden messages in the album and long story short, Eddie seeks some retribution on those who have bullied him and Sammi is able to come back and brings down Mayhem and chaos on his hometown.

Will Eddie be able to figure out a way to stop him before he wipes out the whole town?

Only one way to find out...

I was a mere fourteen years old when a rather loud group of friends I ran with and myself were allowed to attend this film at the theater. Alone. No parental guidance to be had. We almost got kicked out because we were reacting like jackasses to all the kills and shouting at the screen as they happened. Ah, to be young again.

Not only did I think the story was completely badass but I was also into heavy metal at that age and I fell instantly in love with Mr. Sammi Curr, the Satanic Rock God. Talk about swoon! Bestill my young, beating teenage heart! I still to this day think he's one of the sexiest dudes to ever grace the screen in a horror film. Go ahead and laugh but all you ladies of the eighties out there know I'm right.

Here's a fun fact for you: WASP frontman, Blackie Lawless was to originally play the part of Sammi Curr. Can you imagine?! No way would it have been the same movie or had the same effect on me!

For a horror film, Trick or Treat is admittedly low on scares and not very heavy on the gore but it is so much fun to watch. Seeing Eddie give those that have bullied him their just desserts was a nice sight (66 crush!!) and even though you know it isn't right, you can't help but applaud his actions.

And not only that but can we talk about how freaking awesome the soundtrack is? Holy shit Fastway killed it!! It is one of the best soundtracks in horror and I love it. It is still in constant rotation in my disc changer and now my fifteen year old son loves it also.

And here's another fun fact: Former Fastway front man is the lead singer of Flogging Molly.

Trick or Treat is one of my favorite horror films hands down, and I will watch it ANYTIME of the year but in my opinion, it definitely warrants a must watch during the Halloween season, and for me personally, it's always on Halloween night. Because of his love for the soundtrack, I plan to one day I plan to show my son this classic cinematic horror gem. Who knows, maybe it'll be THIS Halloween!

Posted by Amy Mead in MOVIE REVIEWS, REVIEWS, 0 comments
HALLOWEEN HORRORS: Strangeland (1998)

HALLOWEEN HORRORS: Strangeland (1998)

By John Roisland


October 2, 1998, was a time when people were still learning about the Internet and body modification was really breaking through. Director John Pieplow brings us Strangeland.

The story is about "Captain Howdy" (played by Dee Snider of rock band Twisted Sister, who also wrote and produced the film), a sadist Internet predator who invites other internet friends over for a party, where they soon meet their end.

Kevin Gage (Heat, Blow, G.I. Jane, Laid to Rest) the town sheriff is quick on the case after his daughter, played by Linda Cardellini (Grandma's Boy, Avengers: Age of Ultron, Freaks and Geeks), falls to the hands of Captain Howdy.

The chase continues to find Howdy, and the scenes of the torture with his victims and his own self mutilation are actually pretty impressive. A few scenes are actual text book history of how different cultures used different devices to either torture or elevate one to a higher sense body limitations.

Now I'm not saying its the best film ever's not. At moments its actually kinda slow. But I will give Dee props on his first attempt and writing, producing and starring in....he put forth a very valiant effort. At the box office, this film actually lost money. If not for its huge impact as a cult would have been a complete bomb!

It offers a pretty impressive cast, aside from Dee Snyder, Kevin Gage and Linda Cardellini it also stars Elizabeth Pena (Jacobs Ladder, Down in the Valley, Things Behind the Sun), Brett Harrelson (The People vs. Larry Flynt, From Dusk Till Dawn 2: Texas Blood Money), Robert Englund (Nightmare on Elm Street, Wishmaster, Urban Legend, 2001 Maniacs, Behind the Mask: The Rise of Leslie Vernon), Amy Smart(The Butterfly Effect, Crank, Just Friends, Starsky and Hutch) and Robert Lasardo (Death Race, The Human Centipede III, Anarchy Parlor, Nip/Tuck). Now with this line up, one would expect a little more...but they only acted in it

For those head bangers out there like myself, the film did have a pretty kick fucking ass soundtrack though: Bile, Pantera, Megadeth, Coal Chamber, Anthrax, Soul Fly and Hed PE to name a few.

I can't say this is honestly on my every year must watch Halloween films...but it is always this time of year when I do think about it the most. Does that count?

I REALLY want to say better things about the film, but sadly it is what it is, a great idea, that just wasn't executed to its fullest potential.


"So much little time"- Captain Howdy

Posted by John Roisland in MOVIE REVIEWS, REVIEWS, 0 comments
Synapse Films Restores Dario Argento’s Tenebre

Synapse Films Restores Dario Argento’s Tenebre

By Amy Mead

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Recently, on October 22nd, I was privileged enough to take part in a one night only screening of the most recent remaster effort by the geniuses over at Synapse Films, Dario Argento's Tenebre. The bonus features are still being worked on and the finished product is expected to be released on Blu-ray in the early part of 2016.

Every time I watch a new Synapse remaster, I am blown away and it was no different with Tenebre. It was truly stunning. I was seriously taken aback by how good it looked and I am chomping at the bit to see what the bonus features might have in store for us.

I was so taken with the quality and clarity of Tenebre that when I got home from the screening that night, I had to throw in my old copy to see the difference and I was absolutely floored. I don't know how these guys do it. Talk about talent and skill!! I have seen several of of the Synapse Film remaster efforts and I love them all. But this one? It is simply breathtaking. You really have to see it to believe it.

Synapse Films also has plans to restore two other Dario Argento films, Phenomena (aka Creepers) and Suspiria and I am beside myself with anticipation after seeing what they've done with Tenebre. I am now extremely eager to see what they do with these films. We will of course keep you up to date with the progress on those films and will share any updates as soon as we are made aware of them.

In addition to the screening there was an announcement made by The Flint Horror Collective's Chris Ringler about the fate of the Flint Horror Con. Sadly, it is no more. HOWEVER, there will be new event taking place in 2016 called The Monster Marketplace and it will be a great place for Michigan area horror fans to find all sorts of one of a kind horror creations from many local, independent artists and vendors. Rumor has it there may even be a celebrity or two, so stay tuned for info on that.

Many thanks to Synapse Films, The Flint Horror Collective, Mott Community College, and Black and Gold Film Productions for making this one night only event a reality for us. I am thrilled to have been able to show my support and participate in an event such as this and honestly cannot thank them all enough for this experience. It's not too often cool stuff happens on the horror front in Michigan. It was truly an honor and a privilege. Anyone who did not attend this event and had the means should be kicking themselves right now. Hard.

I give this remaster a 10/10 Psychotic American authors.

Posted by Amy Mead in MOVIE REVIEWS, REVIEWS, 0 comments
MOVIE REVIEW: Tales of Halloween (2015)

MOVIE REVIEW: Tales of Halloween (2015)

By Amy Mead

Tales of Halloween Poster


One night. One town. Ten chilling stories.

Tales of Halloween is a anthology film in which a series of shorts are brought to us by ten directors well known horror directors. The ten stories are interwoven in that they all take place on Halloween night in a what is normally a quiet suburb but on this particular Halloween night, all hell has broken loose and the unsuspecting citizens are tormented by ghouls, monsters, and killers of all types.

The cops in this town have much more than they can handle this Halloween and there is a pretty good chance that there just may not be enough EMT's and coroners left to process the bodies by the time this night is over.

Sweet Tooth

Written and directed by David Parker

Starring Caroline Williams, Greg Grunberg, Cameron Easton and Hunter Smit

After teen babysitter and her boyfriend tell a scary story about a local urban legend to her charge, Timmy. they break the cardinal rule and eat all of Timmy's candy. Now they are fair game for "Sweet Tooth"...

The Night Billy Raised Hell

Written by Clint Sears

Directed by Darren Lynn Bousman

Starring Barry Bostick, Marcus Eckert, Sage Stewart and

After being goaded into playing a prank by his sister and her boyfriend, young Billy tries to play a trick on the devil himself and pays the ultimate price.


Written by Greg Commons

Directed by Adam Geirasch

Starring Tiffany Shepis and John F. Beach with a cameo by Rebekah McKendry

Two couples are watching a movie and passing out candy to the trick or treaters until things take a very violent turn. People are not always as they appear.

This one is the darkest of the tales and also my favorite .

The Weak and The Wicked

Written by Molly Millions

Directed by Paul Solet

Starring Keir Gilchrist, Grace Phipps, BooBoo Stewart and Noah Segan

A young man summons a demon to dispatch the three bullies who forever changed his life

Grim Grinning Ghost

Written and directed by Axelle Carolyn

Starring Lin Shaye, Alex Essoe, Barbara Crampton featuring an appearance by Stuart Gordon

A scary story told at a Halloween party soon becomes a frightening reality for one of the party-goers.

Ding Dong

Written and directed by Lucky McKee

Starring Pollyanna McIntosh and Marc Senter

And Hansel and Gretel thought they had it bad...

This Means War

Written and directed by Andrew Kasch and John Skipp

Starring James Duvall, Elissa Dowling and an appearance by Sean Clarke

What should be a friendly competition between two neighbors about who has the best Halloween decorations gets a little out of hand.

Friday the 31st

Written by Mike Mendez and Dave Parker

Directed by Mike Mendez

Starring Nick Principe

A deformed killer living in the woods meets his match when a tiny visitor becomes upset when his cries of "Trick or Treat" repeatedly go unanswered.

The Ransom of Rusty Rex

Written and directed by Ryan Schifrin

Starring Sam Whitwer and Ben Woolfe

and featuring an appearance by John Landis

Two kidnappers robbers are in for a surprise when their grand plan to abduct a rich man's kid and get the ransom goes horribly awry.

The Bad Seed

Written and directed by Neil Marshall

Starring Cerina Vincent, Pat Healy and Kristina Klebe

A hardened police woman tries to save the town from an overgrown man eating pumpkin bent on ravaging the entire town.

I am a big fan of anthology films and I was not disappointed with Tales of Halloween at all. There are so many things for the audience to love about this film. There are revered horror icons aplenty and the stories, although rather short, are a pleasant mix that range from funny and entertaining to creepy and gory, and all of them are a lot of fun to watch. I do however wish some of the stories were just a little bit darker.

The talent bank with the writers and directors alone is phenomenal but then you add in all the insane acting talent and you've struck gold.

In addition to Tales of Halloweens enormous star studded cast, with many cameos by many revered horror figures, (Joe Dante, John Landis, Barry Bostwick, John Savage, and many others) Tales of Halloween boasts quite a few homages to some of the old horror favorites, ranging from Adrienne Barbeau as the DJ helping listeners to usher in the witching hour, to a candy bar labeled "Carpenter's" rather than Hershey's, as well as many other nods to the genre we all know and love. If you are a fan of anthologies you are bound to enjoy Tales of Halloween. I know I sure did. It has definitely made its way onto my Halloween season must watch list, and I strongly recommend you see it for yourself as soon as possible. If you haven't yet, you are truly missing out on a fun watch.

I give Tales of Halloween 8/10 organic man eating pumpkins

Posted by Amy Mead in MOVIE REVIEWS, REVIEWS, 2 comments
HALLOWEEN HORRORS: Hellraiser (1987)

HALLOWEEN HORRORS: Hellraiser (1987)

By Machete Von Kill

Hellraiser poster

Director: Clive Barker; Writer: Clive Barker (adapted from The Hellbound Heart) Stars: Doug Bradley, Ashley Laurence, Clare Higgins; Rating: R; Run Time: 94 min; Genre: Horror; Country: USA; Language: English; Year: 1987

Sexual deviant Frank (Sean Chapman) inadvertently opens a portal to hell when he tinkers with a box he bought while abroad. The act unleashes gruesome beings called Cenobites, who tear Frank's body apart. When Frank's brother Larry (Andrew Robinson) and his wife, Julia (Clare Higgins), move into Frank's old house, they accidentally bring what is left of Frank back to life. Frank then convinces Julia, his one-time lover, to lure men back to the house so he can use their blood to reconstruct himself. (Summary from IMDb.)

I honestly don't remember how old I was the first time I saw Hellraiser. It was some time in middle school. And I've seen it eleventy billion times since. It is one of my favorite movies of all time, and I don't mean just horror movies either. I can probably recite almost every line from the movie and had Pinhead as a notification alert on my cellphone (I can't lie. After several texts from a close friend, I had to change it. LOL! Pinhead was starting to creep me out!)

Meeting Doug Bradley aka Pinhead

I have to say, seeing Doug Bradley's name on the guest list for Motor City Nightmares last year was one of the biggest reasons I wanted to go. I was heartbroken when it became clear I couldn't afford tickets. Thanks to Dark Legacy Haunted House, I WON A GOLD PASS and was able to meet PINHEAD himself. I will full on admit, I was extremely nervous about meeting Mr. Bradley. I was a complete mess. Nervous stutter when I could speak, dry mouth and shaking like a leaf. Mr. Bradley put up with me (LOL) and was nice enough to take photos with me, autograph my DVD, and accepted my gift to him, a hand painted Pinhead Christmas ornament. I could go on and on about Doug Bradley, but that's not why we're here. Let's get back to the movie.

The scene when Frank begins to regenerate after absorbing his brother's blood through the floor boards is both totally gross and totally captivating. You can't turn away, even though you want to. And the subsequent scenes of Frank consuming the blood of the men Julia brings to the house are just as gross and captivating. The sounds effects alone are gag worthy.

I can't say I have any sympathy for Frank or Julia. Frank was a sick, mean, creepy bastard when he was alive and Julia, a cheating tramp. Who sleeps with their newly wedded husband's brother!? Ick! Dirty ho! They totally deserved each other and all of the tortures dished out by the Cenobites. It seems so fitting that Frank ended up consuming Julia.

And the Cenobites themselves, HOLY WAH! As if Pinhead wasn't terrifying enough, throw in Chatterer (Nicholas Vince), Butterball (Simon Bamford), and the female Cenobite (Grace Kirby)... Nightmare material for days! Deliciously evil and brilliant. Bravo to Clive Barker for bringing these henchmen of Hell to life.

The movie is dark, beautiful, gory and everything a good horror movie should be. Even with the 1987 special effects, it still stands up today as one of the greatest ever made. And I'm really unhappy to hear that it will be rebooted. It is a classic that needs to be left alone. Sure, make another sequel (just please, please, please do a better job than the last few), but there's no reason to reboot.

If you haven't yet seen this masterpiece, I'd really like to know what the hell you are waiting for.

10 out of 10 Cenobites Tortures

Posted by Machete Von Kill in MOVIE REVIEWS, REVIEWS, 0 comments
MOVIE REVIEW: Crimson Peak (2015)

MOVIE REVIEW: Crimson Peak (2015)

By Dixielord

Guillermo Del Toro definitely knows how to make a big beautiful film, but can he do a horror movie? His last ghost movie, Mama, just didn't do it for me. The wispy CGI ghosts just don't do it for me, and while it wasn’t a bad story, the ghosts bored me more than frightened me. But now he tries again with Crimson Peak.

Crimson Peaks Jessica Chastain

Crimson Peak's Jessica Chastain

Crimson Peak is a big scale Gothic ghost story starring Tom Hiddleston, Charlie Hunnam, Jessica Chastain and Mia Wasikowska (Stoker). And let's get it straight if I try and type Mia's gull name over and over I'm going to eventually fuck it up, so from now on, I'm sticking to Mia.

Mia plays Edith Cushing, the heir to her father's fortune who is haunted by the ghost of her dead mother. She finds herself, and her father's money courted by the titled, but broke, Baronet Thomas Sharp played by Tom Hiddleston (The Avengers, Thor). This doesn't sit well with her father played by Jim Beaver (Supernatural), or the president of the local biker club, whoops, local doctor and childhood friend Charlie Hunnam (Sons of Anarchy). After her father's murder, she agrees to marry Hiddleston and move to his ancestral home, known by the locals as Crimson Peak. There the hauntings continue and animosity grows between Mia and her sister in law Lucille played by Jessica Chastain (Mama). Back in America the jilted Dr. McMichael (Hunnam) investigates and finds things the good Baronet is hiding things. He rushes to Crimson Peak to save Edith, but with her health mysteriously declining and winter setting in, will he be in time?

Mia Wasikowska in Crimson Peak

Mia in Crimson Peak

With Crimson Peak, Del Toro has crafted a truly beautiful film. Even his ghosts, beyond the black wispy phantoms, he has added a blood red to go with the films title and theme. The ghosts also have a bit more substance than those in Mama. As they rise out of the floor and walls of the dilapidated castle, I'll admit they made me jump a couple of times. I'm still not a big fan of the CGI ghost, buy they looked better than in Mama. They seemed to have more substance, which made them a bit more realistic and creepy.

The scenery likewise is beautiful to behold. The manor home that is falling apart and especially the white snow, dyed red by the clay that gives Crimson Peak it's name. Then add to that the cast of beautiful people in Hunnam, Hiddleston and Mia, and you have a film that is a visual treat.

But is it scary? Like I mentioned above, it actually gave me a few startles and I cant complain about that. Mostly however, Crimson Peak is a Gothic ghost story, more focused on romance and mystery than horror. It harkens back to when ghosts were more of a protective and warning spirit than an agent of chaos. While the ghosts do provide some scares, they necessarily where the horror lies in Crimson Peak.

The main story here is the mystery that Crimson Peaks holds. What happened to the mother of Thomas and Lucille? What is the relationship between the two siblings and what is the secret that he desperately tries to hide from Edith? And can Jax move on from his father’s death to lead the club, wait no, another project...

Charlie Hunnam in Crimson Peak

No motorcycles or giant robots for Charlie Hunnam in Crimson Peak

Crimson Peak ends up being a bit of a tragedy, and I wont give away any more than I have already. Go see it. It's not a grand horror movie, but it is a well acted, and beautiful ghost story with a real Gothic feel. I'm giving it 7 and ¾ stars out of 10.

Posted by Allen Alberson in MOVIE REVIEWS, REVIEWS, 0 comments